Other highlights include: the chance to make your very own aromatherapy pillow spray; a variety of sessions that will get you moving, singing, or otherwise expressing your creative side, including the opportunity to be part of a dance performance on Friday; and, a round-table discussion that will help you better understand the relationships between the myriad topics being covered in our other sessions.
I'll spray some aromas on your pillow.
It's kinda like jackin' off...and I like jackin' off...but it is personal and should be done in private. Public group masturbation is just gross. How about we toss in a seminar on media literacy? I think we'd all agree that it would go a long way towards societal wellness.
Mentioned that last weekend was a busy one for yours truly. Friday night was the Community Center auction. These are the times I especially lament when Betty is on the road cause she is so good with people and I can ride her coattails. Still was a fun night as almost everyone in town that I enjoy comes out for it. And being the person that makes up the seating chart for all the tables, can handpick who I spend the bulk of the evening with. Only thing I bought was a raffle prize of a couple bottles of vino, one of which was from Israel that is obviously Jesus wine.
My wine guy says it's decent stuff. I was seriously over served on auction night, which made the degree of difficulty selling hot dogs at the Food Fair the next day that much higher.
The school has two big fairs each year and cannot remember how many times I have been in charge of the hot dog booth, but it is either 6 or 7. Our goal each time is to prepare and sell between 700 and 1000 big ol' Costco dogs for the attendees. Over the years, have recruited a fine bunch of parent and kid volunteers, with the majority originating from the girls soccer club I used to help manage. Those girls still come out and look so great in their pink and black uniforms that we are a draw. Saw them posing for photos all day long. When I started at the school, they would get these big steamers to heat the dogs and looking how they did it, was disgusted by them. The water got nasty fast and they were never that hot. We slowly transitioned to grilling them, first using propane, then by charcoal, which made them taste the best even though getting and keeping the heat right for 6 hours straight can be a challenge...especially when it rained.
Last October, it did just that and it was coming down sideways for several hours. This year was forcasted to be mixed, and the morning started off grey and misty, but while the clouds never went away, the rain did and we had ideal conditions for standing in front of the hot charcoals. While it isn't necessarily comfortable standing in front of a grill all day, standing there with a bunch of fellas and shooting the shit is one of life's greatest pleasures. This year, we had an on/off discussion for 5 hours about if it was superior to grill the dogs horizontally or perpendicular to the grating. I prefer the company of women, but you don't get that kind of intensely inane and enjoyable chatter with the girls.
Having the right amount of dogs is always a crap shoot as demand is very weather driven as this population hates to get wet, so when it rains, we are scrambling. Our only tool to move dogs faster is by lowering the price (2 for 1 style), and we kicked into that gear at just the right time as we sold out 23 minutes before the Fair ended. We might have made it till the end, but a morning mishap caused us to be about 30 dogs short. One of the trays carrying our partially cooked dogs (we boil them all early morning so we can just finish them off on the grill) fell in the hallway and many souls (and toes and anusus) were lost. Me and the other dude that were transporting them looked at each other and we both knew that we could just rinse them off and cook them for later, but we dropped them in the main hallway with a hundred people looking on, so that move was out of the question. Someone said I should take a photo of the deceased to prove I didn't just go in the back and repurpose them, which I did.
If there was one beef I had for the day, it was that the powers that be moved our booth from its traditional locale. We have always been in the same spot, and I always say to them to please keep us there and to let us know if they are going to move us so I can lobby to keep us in our prime location. When the Fair map comes out, I see they shifted us down to the middle of the aisle and put the gawdamn Korean ladies in our spot. Look, I know they got some pull, but that is just low and will not be forgotten. Our move was not lost on others and was asked about it throughout the day. Got knowing nods when I told them that I never argue with a Korean and spread a rumor that they were not simply Koreans, but the "northern" variety. I might have even said to more trusted of my cohorts that while we were serving hot dogs, unlike the Korean booth, at least ours weren't made from actual canines.
I don't remember this being asked previously, but a bunch of folks wanted to know if the dogs were beef or pork. To be honest, I really don't know but if they asked if they were beef, I said yes, which was the same answer I gave if they asked if they were pork. That's the good thing about selling meat in Taiwan as they aren't too hung up on what kind of animal they ingest.
The locals are a bit leery of our grill however, cause if the meat gets charred, the local opinion is that it can give you cancer. So many of them actually walked behind the booth and watched us while we worked. They seem satisfied with our hygiene and technique however and we had many a satisfied customer.
Had the occasion to show a Seattle buddy around town for a day this week. He was in town for 72 hours for work and arranged to have a free day to see the sights...asked if he wanted to do the traditional ones or if he wanted Weird Taipei. Fortunately for him, he chose wisely and went weird. I have my beats that I like and think that I have it dialed in for a perfect day. NOTE...if you're thinking about coming to Taiwan for a visit and are the type that wants to be surprised and don't want to know what is in store for you, stop reading now cause this is what we'll be doing.
I really try to make this space an honest affair and in an effort to give equal time, have to mention that the weather finally turned. Has been just delightful the last few days and tour day was scrumptious. Sunny, warm in just the right way where you could wear pants, but shorts were just fine. Perfectly comfortable standing around, but if you go for a little exercise, will get just sweaty enough where the trickle will go down your spine and not drench your entire outfit.
The day started around 10am, after the morning rush hour for a drive, into the country to see the Cihu Chiang Kai Shek memorial park. Have detailed this place a couple of times, but not only is it Chiang's (next to) final resting place, but all of the statues of the Generalissimo that they took down in quiet shame from around the country are gathered in one place.
Then, leisurely drive back into town for late light lunch of Dim Sum at the Palace Hotel, whose restaurant is perched on a hill overlooking downtown. One can wander around the 70's era grandeur for a bit, and perhaps sneak into one of the secret tunnels that were built to allow for a hasty exit for the junta should the commies come a knockin'
And then the highlight of any day in Taipei...a trip to the Shrimping District. Time made us go during the early afternoon lull so we didn't get the full people watching experience, but you really don't need it as shrimping itself is a sport unlike any other.
Apres-shrimping, we met up with Betty for dinner. Another buddy recently sent me a link to a review of a Taipei restaurant that sells the worlds most expensive beef noodle soup. It is called Niu Ba Ba, which means Cow Daddy, and you can read about it here, but the most expensive bowl costs US$329. They had other lower priced ones and we thought that it would be a good addition to the Weird Taiwan tour. Betty and I would never go on our own, and it would be a good place with someone with an unlimited spending account, but since we had a guest, is the kind of place that made sense to give a try for the experience. Betty chose the $15 bowl, but us fellas splurged and went for the $45 variety.
We had a few minutes free before we ran our guest out to the airport and were near Costco, so took him on an inside tour that only Betty can give. She can pick out almost any item and give its back story...is an enjoyable experience for anyone. I learned the new Kirkland toilet paper, while not only 3-ply, had a long involved testing process to give it its textured embossed quality. I love a little texture while I wipe personally...
So come to Taiwan for 48 hours and will show you around.
Finally for this week, Babydoll was in the big annual dance production at school. An interpretation of the story of albino hemophiliac Anastasia, must say that I was dreading it. Musicals, operas, dance productions...not my wheelhouse. I could sit for a weekend in the cold and rain of some hick town watching baseball and not complain (OK, I would complain a lot, but wouldn't dread going in advance), but sitting in a dark auditorium for an hour and a half watching dance? Torture.
But you support your kids and this is a big deal for her, so we committed to going two of the four nights. I didn't hate it. The spirit of the cast was high, super talented kids choreographed impeccable, and the scenery and costuming was at a level one could see on Broadway. I ended up coming out really liking it and will no longer fear going to the next one. The moment I went all in came during one of the big cast scenes. About 40 teenagers on stage at one point were all doing their own moves, and at just the right beat, they all turned and linked arms to do a group maneuver. The seamlessness of all the individual actions coming together as one really got to me. Equated it with how a football team can make the perfect play only when everyone does their part perfectly and in unison with the other teammates doing the same. Will definitely not become a Dance Mom, but maybe a Stage Dad? Whatevs...personal growth can come in various ways at odd times and at any stage in life.
The school was adamant about not taking photos/videos, but did sneak a video of one of the scenes that is too big to share. Maybe can compress one once the official video comes out, but enjoy these awful blurry ones I managed to butcher in the meantime.
