Hey there,
This week saw the best headline yours truly could hope for...Taiwan faces cool week ahead. OK, obviously the best headline would be 'President Arrested', but that was good and it has been absolutely delightful around here fall week. I thought for a second that we might have gotten the arrested thing when I saw this article with the headline Taiwanese police bust 'Trump' dope lab, but it was one detailing how these guys got caught making 'narcotic coffee powder' and put it in pouches with 45 on it.
After reading the article, not sure what these things are made of or do, something about coffee and bath salts, but have to give the guy props for his marketing skills
One more piece of local news that is all the rage, the Taiwanese woman fined at a beach resort in the Philippines for wearing an itsy-bitsy, teenie-weenie micro bikini.
It took a long, long time to find an image that wasn't blurred or pixilated, but I take the time for the sake of art and in devotion to the folks that click on this space. Of course this image found was from the Daily Mail as those Brits love them some public nudity.
Staying in this part of the world, have to share this beginner's guide to Asian hot sauces. Have never gone on an exhaustive personal search for them as they are always oily and disappointing, I have had all of these somehow and the one we keep in our fridge is Laoganma chili oil with black beans. Use it on rice when we eat Asian food and it does a decent job. Never knew it was called Laogammaas we have always referred to it as the Angry Lady sauce due to the angry lady's face on the jar. As the old adage goes...If it pisses off a Chinese woman, it has to be good.
Speaking of old adages, check out this list of 26 lies they tell Chinese children. You've seen a few of these in this space before, but some new ones for you to ponder...
1) If you don't finish the rice in your bowl, you'll get freckles on your face.
I personally think freckles are cute. More for me I guess.
4) If you bit your tongue while talking, it means meat for dinner tonight.
A commentary on the state of nutrition and seems that one would be trying to bite their tongues in getting some glorious meat to eat. Left out is what kind of meat they are to get
6) Always eat chicken feet in even numbers, otherwise your hand will tremble when you write and your characters will be ineligible.
Two of my favorite things finally together...eating chicken feet and writing in Chinese
11) Eating earwax will make you dumb
As a purveyor of all things that have to do with body emissions, I have never heard of eating earwax nor has it ever crossed my mind. Gimme a second... Not bad. Tastes more like a French thing though
12) If a girl is kissed by a boy, she will soon have a child to take care of.
Some things have been true since the first creatures crawled out of the seas. Updated version...if a boy rides on the back of a scooter a girl is driving...
14) Infants can't eat chicken feet or they'll tear books when they grow up
Who is tearing up a book? I've seen muscle men tear up a phone book and videos of book burnings (just last week as a matter of fact). With all the little bones in a chicken foot, choking would be my number 1 thru 10 concern.
15) Two people that share a duck head will soon start quarreling.
Makes perfect sense
19) If you cut your toenails at night, you'll fall down the next day.
I sweat this is true. Saw Babydoll doing it a few weeks ago and sure enough, she took a spill the next day.
22) If you ride a dog, the crotch of your trousers will split.
Now they're just making shit up
25) If you do eye exercises with your eyes open, you'll go blind (Chinese children have to do eye exercises twice a day in school. They hate it as it's boring and infringes on play time, while teachers are very strict watching them).
Would have thought I had heard about this before now, but apparently they do eye exercises at school twice a day to combat high rates of myopia found in Asian students. This might explain why I see so many crosseyed folks around town. I don't know if they do that in Taiwan schools but am on the case. I always thought myopia was seeing things in a narrow way intellectually but totally makes sense that it also means nearsightedness. Anyhoo, here is a great video of the eye exercises they do.
I did them and felt a lot more relaxed.
Finally for today, am sharing this video of 45 doing an impersonation of two people having sex. He did this last week and he is the President of the United States.
This week saw the best headline yours truly could hope for...Taiwan faces cool week ahead. OK, obviously the best headline would be 'President Arrested', but that was good and it has been absolutely delightful around here fall week. I thought for a second that we might have gotten the arrested thing when I saw this article with the headline Taiwanese police bust 'Trump' dope lab, but it was one detailing how these guys got caught making 'narcotic coffee powder' and put it in pouches with 45 on it.
One more piece of local news that is all the rage, the Taiwanese woman fined at a beach resort in the Philippines for wearing an itsy-bitsy, teenie-weenie micro bikini.
It took a long, long time to find an image that wasn't blurred or pixilated, but I take the time for the sake of art and in devotion to the folks that click on this space. Of course this image found was from the Daily Mail as those Brits love them some public nudity.
Staying in this part of the world, have to share this beginner's guide to Asian hot sauces. Have never gone on an exhaustive personal search for them as they are always oily and disappointing, I have had all of these somehow and the one we keep in our fridge is Laoganma chili oil with black beans. Use it on rice when we eat Asian food and it does a decent job. Never knew it was called Laogammaas we have always referred to it as the Angry Lady sauce due to the angry lady's face on the jar. As the old adage goes...If it pisses off a Chinese woman, it has to be good.
Speaking of old adages, check out this list of 26 lies they tell Chinese children. You've seen a few of these in this space before, but some new ones for you to ponder...
1) If you don't finish the rice in your bowl, you'll get freckles on your face.
I personally think freckles are cute. More for me I guess.
4) If you bit your tongue while talking, it means meat for dinner tonight.
A commentary on the state of nutrition and seems that one would be trying to bite their tongues in getting some glorious meat to eat. Left out is what kind of meat they are to get
6) Always eat chicken feet in even numbers, otherwise your hand will tremble when you write and your characters will be ineligible.
Two of my favorite things finally together...eating chicken feet and writing in Chinese
11) Eating earwax will make you dumb
As a purveyor of all things that have to do with body emissions, I have never heard of eating earwax nor has it ever crossed my mind. Gimme a second... Not bad. Tastes more like a French thing though
12) If a girl is kissed by a boy, she will soon have a child to take care of.
Some things have been true since the first creatures crawled out of the seas. Updated version...if a boy rides on the back of a scooter a girl is driving...
14) Infants can't eat chicken feet or they'll tear books when they grow up
Who is tearing up a book? I've seen muscle men tear up a phone book and videos of book burnings (just last week as a matter of fact). With all the little bones in a chicken foot, choking would be my number 1 thru 10 concern.
15) Two people that share a duck head will soon start quarreling.
Makes perfect sense
19) If you cut your toenails at night, you'll fall down the next day.
I sweat this is true. Saw Babydoll doing it a few weeks ago and sure enough, she took a spill the next day.
22) If you ride a dog, the crotch of your trousers will split.
Now they're just making shit up
25) If you do eye exercises with your eyes open, you'll go blind (Chinese children have to do eye exercises twice a day in school. They hate it as it's boring and infringes on play time, while teachers are very strict watching them).
Would have thought I had heard about this before now, but apparently they do eye exercises at school twice a day to combat high rates of myopia found in Asian students. This might explain why I see so many crosseyed folks around town. I don't know if they do that in Taiwan schools but am on the case. I always thought myopia was seeing things in a narrow way intellectually but totally makes sense that it also means nearsightedness. Anyhoo, here is a great video of the eye exercises they do.
Finally for today, am sharing this video of 45 doing an impersonation of two people having sex. He did this last week and he is the President of the United States.
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