March 14th, 2022

Hiya,

It's been a while, but the last two morning's peace and quiet was shattered by effin' funeral processions.  At 6am on Sunday and 5:30am Monday morning.  Here is an example...turn the volume up full blast to get a feel for the torture. 

I can't sleep past 5:30 anyway, so it is only irritating to me, but the poor boss was shaken awake far sooner than needed.  Sometimes I wake up grumpy, but most of the time I let her sleep.  The answer to the question 'what the fuck is up with a 5:30am wake up call for the dead' is always answered that it is due to being an auspicious time on the yellow calendar.  Pagans.  You don't see the early processions with the pole dancers either.

Pretty quiet around these parts.  Got hot this week and broke out the oscillating fans.  Also had my Aussie Rules Football fantasy/fairy tale draft.  Feel good about that...got Christian Petraca and Marcus Bontempelli with the first two picks...the two finest Italian heritage fellas in the comp.  Opening bounce is this Wednesday so that'll be on constantly through September.

And baseball got figured out.  Happy to know that I'll be watching the Mariners a bunch this summer.  As for our local teams, we have a couple weeks left of the season and a big trip to a tournament in Hualien the weekend of the 25 to finish off the year.  Last year, our bus ride down was 11 hours as there was a horrific train wreck that day that killed 49 people and plugged the only route there.  It has its own Wikipedia page.

Gonna be so much fun.  The Boss is gonna come down and she has made friends with he parents and other coaches, so a good weekend away for us.  The kids will of course be a riot.  One of the topics this last week has been gut health.  On Saturday, our starting left fielder made it to the game but couldn't play cause he had diarrhea  The trainer had to take him to the porta potty out in left field and helped him hydrate after he evacuated his bowels.  Another kid takes multiple poops in the morning, so our early games are a minefield for him.  A few weeks ago, I am going to the porta potty for a pee, and I see this kid's dad with a pack of wipes trying to mop up the shit on his pants.  Kid tells me, 'you don't want to go in there Coach'  I didn't.  

I was walking the track last week and one of the kids mom's was there too, so we walked a few laps together.  I tell the kid I walked the track with his mom today, and another one of the dumber kids standing close by says, "does that mean you had sex?"  Jeezus.  

And will add one more reason why baseball is the best.  At our game on Saturday, a kid takes a pitch well over his head for a ball.  Of course, someone says 'good eye'.  You'd have to have severe cataracts to swing at that pitch, but baseball is all about meaningless chatter.  But then some smart ass on the bench sarcastically says 'superior' eye.  We then spend the next 20 minutes coming up with synonyms for "good eye".  

Lastly, I also help with a U15 and U12 team, and some of these kids are newish.  Am talking to the U12's and they ask me how old I am, to which I reply 'how old do you think I am?'.  Little fucker says 60.  I mean, I am 56, but that still hurts.