August 25th, 2017

I wonder how many of words I've written about the weather on this page in the last 5 years.  10...20 thousand?  Well here's a couple more.  A typhoon passed by the south of Taiwan this week and we had about 36 hours of still hot, but windy weather, which cooled off the apartment a bit.  Other than those two days, the high each day has been in the hundred and teens.  It's 10:40am on Thursday and measures 117.  Kill(ing) me.  Take no credit for this, but heard someone compare the sweat one feels in heat like this as being 'like a male prostitute waiting in line to see the Pope'.

Anyone know anything about arthritis?  I got a ton of it all over.  Was just talking to the lady that cleans our apartment and she was complaining about her knee and it being arthritic...said she ate some beans that aggravated it.  What?  I love beans.  She tells me that beans, potatoes and peanuts all cause arthritis to get worse.  I eat at least one of those three things every day, and sometimes all them at once.  Gonna have to do some research. 

Someone asked me if I miss the Boy now that he's at school.  Of course, but have to share something weird...maybe a bit dark and definitely twisted.  Over the last few nights, have had college themed dreams.  Can't remember much about any of them except one.  In it, was visiting Boy-o and he introduces us to a girl, which if he ever introduces us to one means it is his "special friend".  This woman is one of his teachers, and she asks him if he wants to come over for some "Netflix and chill".  Will let you Freudians out there dissect the meaning of that one.

Am sure I mentioned it before, but I really love the In Our Time podcast.  A BBC thing for 15 years, the host invites three scholars on for a talk about everything from Aesop to Zoroastrianism.  Always learn something from each and they are  a great way to escape from the daily grind of politics while bettering your brain.  They talk in subdued British accents, which is great for nap time.  Heard a great quote that sums up the Chinese and their mentality towards life  on an episode about Taoism.  An allegory about building a path and coming up against a thousand pound stone.  Instead of fighting it, they wait a 1000 years for it to erode and then just flick it away.  I wonder who is their 1000 pound stone is these days?

Big news in town this week are the Universiade Games.  A mini-Olympics for college athletes held every two years since the 50's but no one has ever heard of them.  Guessing they aren't a huge deal to anyone but the participants, but to the Taiwanese, international recognition of any kind is huge and they have been scrubbing the city and fixing up the venues for the last 2-3 years in preparation.  I can only hope that they are holding it now, during the peek of sun stroke season, and also during the most dangerous of Chinese months...Ghost Month...as it was pre-ordained from the Universiade governing body, cause being les miserables does not help put Taiwan's best face forward.

That ghost month link was in the local paper and recaps most everything that we've shared about it here in years past, with the exception of # 19.  "Do not step on or kick the offerings left on the roadside".  I have been wanting to kick the roadside offerings for years but now know I can do so the other 11 months out of the year without spirit reprisal.

At the local Sports University across the street, they have official basketball, diving and baseball events.  The ticket sales are confusing at best and I can't buy them even thought the venues are half full/empty when watching on TV.  Think it has to do with tickets being good for the whole days worth of competition and people come and go.  While  I'd like to check it out, with the aforementioned heat and entrance frustration, and that I have enough sports to occupy my mind at this time of year, am not broken up about missing out.

I do see some Universiade happenings as I take my walk around campus, and the other day stumbled on the US soccer team as they practiced on the schools (newly installed artificial) field.  As it is a hundred and teen-something out, ask them how they are liking the weather and they can only look at me incredulously.  I add, "Hydrate fellas", which got me thinking that I am doing so a lot.  Not a counter of water intake, these days it has to be gallons a day, and one would think that I'd be peeing constantly, but realized that I am hardly urinating at all and figure that I must be sweating it out before it can get to by bowels.  When I do manage to evacuate my bowels, the urine is the color of Tang.  

A little further along, see a group of athletes and find they are some diving contingents getting a tour of the area where their competition will be.  Never realized that divers are really short with the tallest of the dudes being my height.  And their bodies (boys and girls) were all very smooth.  Anyway, I watch for a bit as a local guy explains the facility in English to groups from Finland, Mexico, Italy and North Korea.  Sports can save us all.  Probably shouldn't go here out of fear of objectifying women, especially in the current environment, but I'm a dude and feel it safe to say that we all check out the opposite sex reflexively.   Out of those four countries, the Finns were blond in the usual style, the Italians were spicy meatballs, and the Mexicans...aye Chihuahua, but the hottest ones for my money were the North Koreans.  Why?  Because they are forbidden.

Last I left off on the summer travelogue, we were done with SF.  Kids and I drove to LA for a 24
 hour stay to visit Betty's mom and her sister's family.  Not much to say about the visit with them other than her mom looked really fit and good.  I did budget time to eat at my two LA must destinations.  Vim on the way into town and Taco Lita the next day.  Boy and I even got an extra burrito to share on our flight outta town.  I don't take a ton of photos, but always take them of Vim and Taco Lita and didn't this time cause of camera issues.  Lucky for you, have been going to these places for 25 and 35 years respectively, so have a portfolio of pix to share.

Vim was really good this time...had felt them slipping last couple of visits, but it was vintage and delicious.

And Taco Lita has tasted the same every time since my freshman year in high school, which is to say...awesome.

We took the red-eye outta LAX to spend a week in the DMV.  Not that I need a reason to visit DC/Baltimore, but we planned Paul's orientation for this week and built in a few days at the end to visit friends/eat food in our old stompin' grounds.

Must say that the west to east coast red-eye, while efficient, messes up your mind and body something fierce.  I was sorta out of it for the 2.5 hour drive down to the University of Virginia (UVA) and got caught by one of the Commonwealth's finest for a $200 speeding ticket.  Virginia is not a state and you'd better not call it that cause you'll get corrected immediately.  What's the difference between a commonwealth and a state you ask?  Why they changed it I can't say, people  just liked it better that way.

We spent 4 nights in a conveniently located B&B and two of the days we had there were spent at orientation.  We split up as I went with the parent group and the Boy went off with the incoming Freshman, excuse me, First Year.  All these schools have their own lingoes and traditions, and UVA has a ton.  They don't use Freshman-Senior and prefer First Year, etc. as they say that a persons education shouldn't be limited to 4 years.  We learned about some of them during our stay and am sure we'll hear about more, but the best was that in your time at the school, everyone has to streak "The Lawn" at least once.  The Lawn is 421 yards long and you have to go down and back.  I tried to start a naked tradition at my university back in the day...being pictured peeing on a vacuum.  It didn't take.

The Lawn is the center of the university that was founded by Thomas Jefferson.  He designed the Rotunda, which caps one end of it and the whole area that surrounds the grass is called the Academical Village.  How an institution of higher learning can get away with calling it Academical is beyond me...that isn't even a real word.   I took zero photos there, but let me tell you that the entire campus is the prettiest I've ever seen.  My sister and dad went to Princeton, and have been there a ton, and I've seen hundreds of schools in my day, and will say without hyperbole that it is the most attractive I've ever visited.  Uniform styling (based on Jefferson's original design...think Monticello if you've ever been there), huge yet still cozy and accessible, facilities from sports to science are all modern and state of the art.  It's like a movie set and as Thomas Jefferson used to say, "Who's the cute light skinned girl over by the butter churn?" Thanks to (UVA alum) Tina Fey for that one.

Speaking of Monticello...have never been.  Not during college or on visits to the area since.  It's only 3 miles off campus and we didn't go this time either.  Told the Boy that the thing to do is to never go. Just like never seeing an  episode of Game of Thrones, or thinking the Beatles are overrated, take a stance against something everyone else does just to be obstinate, and never give in.  The kids asked 'what is wrong with you?", but after a while, they came around and have signed off on this stupid action.

I don't know about other orientations, and the Boy really enjoyed his portion, but the parent one was completely worthless to me.  Maybe it was fine for people that have never had a college experience, but I learned literally nothing.  There was some communal events and then they offered seminars around campus based on interest.  Listened to a shrink explain a chart that shows depression in college students is dropping while anxiety skyrockets (due to too much helicopter parenting apparently), while encouraging emotional resilience.  

This was a topic that we talked over dinners throughout the summer.  Many of our friends have kids that just went, are going or are about to enter into their college application process.  I bristled at the expectation that parents these days go to these orientations and take their kids to school to drop them off/set them up in the dorms.  My position was that my folks didn't do any of that stuff and that wasn't a must do in those days.  They put me on a red-eye to the east coast and said see ya later.  They sent me to BWI airport cause the flight was cheapest but was the furthest and least accessible to the school, and had to figure how to get to campus on my own (and without Google).  Two trains and two buses with all of my gear.   And due to me coming back from senior year of high school in Australia, my first semester was in January, so I had no orientation or anything.  You know what?  I survived.  Will have to ask my sister if they dropped her off.  She went to my dad's precious Princeton, so likely.  They talk about helicoptering and emotional resilience while simultaneously advocating for parents to baby their brats.  You can sign up for drop and fold laundry service for your kids so they don't even have to do their own damn washing.  Was just talking to the Boy (after his first week there) and he was lamenting that the food is boring.  You know, same old options at the multiple cafeterias of Mexican, pasta, sandwiches, Asian, vegetarian....that they sometimes have to use their swipe cards to go to Chik-Fil-A or one of the other dozen or so chain stores the have access to out of boredom.  Shit, we were so happy on the day that they had dried out hamburger patties that were served by the cafeteria worker whose name tag read Sweet Thing, but we renamed Sweat Thing due to the unbearable working conditions at the lone cafeteria on campus .  We stole Cap'n Crunch just to make it through the day.  The only other option we could use our swipe card for was the on campus Roy Rogers that served the exact same dried out hamburger patty.  Yes, they are coddled, but is it too much or is being dropped off at the airport without any assistance better or worse.  My folks didn't even make the trek to DC for my graduation.  Yes, I survived but the consensus as we talked with the other parents was that I was emotionally scarred for life.

Regarding coddling...they do make the college transition so much easier to both kids and parents.  Best example is Bed, Bath & Beyond.  We had time to kill so went by to get the things that he'd need and they told us to come back that night as they were having an event to do just that.  We go back and they are throwing a party...they had food (from Popeye's knockoff Bojangles) and then give you a scanner to go around the store.  You identify your items, bring the scanner to the counter and they will pack and hold them until the day you move in.  Fantastic service...you don't have to lug them around or mess with them during the busy moving in week.  Plus, at the event, we didn't need to collect a bunch of coupons as everything was 20% off.  The kids and I were almost done, and Betty's mom radar must have been going off cause she calls us and then starts questioning all of our choices.  Boy and I, but mostly me, are getting irritated by the interrogation, and then Babydoll decides to show her what's in the cart and she starts going off...Why are you buying so much soap and what are you thinking buying that color of sheets?  We ditch Babydoll and the cart and hide on the other side of the store.

Back to orientation...also went to a seminar as to why you should consider a semester abroad.  A lot of "no duh" moments in that one and wanted to crack wise about it.  Pretty sure they offered the mind numbing events to parents to give them something to do while the kids were off doing their bonding thing, but I abhor the small talk, where are you from BS.  Being a huge introvert when it comes to meeting new people, and add to the fact it was stinkin' hot, the events were all about campus and I was using a cane cause my back was at its worst that week and pretty much went into a shell and didn't speak to anyone.  One of the first things the Boy and I noticed when we were together at the beginning is that in conversations we overheard, during the 'where are you from" portion of the gettin' to know you phase, we heard, I'm from NoVa a ton.  Quickly figured out that meant Northern Virginia.  When we met up again in the afternoon on the second day, he told me that a girl explained that saying you're from NoVa is code for "educated, rich and liberal"  That means if you're from the south, east or western portion of the state, you are dumb, poor and a Trump supporter.  It adds up.

We all thoroughly enjoyed our stay in Charlottesville proper.  Right off campus is an area called "The Corner" and it is a convenient hot spot for students with bars and a damn fine bagel shop.  Boda Bagels refuses to toast your bagel cause they are still warm from the oven.  And their toppings range from traditional cream cheese to roast beef or whatever your heart desires.  Always a line out the door, but they have it down so the wait is 5 minutes tops.   Every UVA person we met before and after mentions in the first three sentences when talking about the place.  After eating there, very well deserved.  Down the street about a mile (with free trolley service) is the towns Downtown Mall, which is a pedestrian only street with hip shops, music/theatre venues/restaurants.  Quaint in just the way you'd imagine, it is the spot that will forever be etched in the American psyche as the location where the nut job ran down the protester during the Confederate statue protest.

We had three more nights/days in the area and spent them with friends and eating our brains out.  Made a return to DC Indian food joint Rasika (where the Obamas go) and had two fabulous Maryland crab meals in Baltimore.  The crab cake place we ate the last couple of years closed and they opened a new location about 40 minutes north of Baltimore, so we had to go.  As we're coming from the south, that meant an additional 1.5 hours of driving to the day, but we did not regret it.  Maryland crab is a life changing experience.

August 20th, 2017

I quote the Simpsons reflexively.  A lot.  But probably no bit more so than the Troy McClure in The Meat Council Presents:  "Meat and You: Partners in Freedom" Number 3F03 in the "Resistance is Useless" Series.  Perfect TV?  I miss Phil Hartman

We've been in Taiwan for 5 years and one of the milestones is that the lease on our car came due.  So we got a new rig this week...

Same model as our last one, just a newer version.  Super nice inside but I think the exterior looks like 

a Transformer.  Babydoll didn't agree, but likes it too.   The people in the spot next to us have the same car and as we pull into the garage last night I yell, "Transformer Twin Powers Activate".  I don't know what transformers say cause I've never seen any more of it than what flashes across a screen before I turn the channels, but that is what the Wonder Twins say and Babydoll has no idea who they are, so took credit for originality.  

Since there are so many of these exact  rides around town, and that I like to show who I am (and what they are up against) to the drivers around me, allow one display of flair on the car..  Put a Sub Pop sticker on the last bumper...can you see my statement this time?

Let's zoom in a bit.

We accept you as one of us!

It has a radar detector, which will come in awfully handy for yours truly.  The problem now is that it talks.  And in Mandarin.  It is obviously telling me stuff but God (and a billion Chinese) only knows what she is saying.  And she won't shut up.  She turns my tunes down and goes off on some angry rant.   Am gonna have to figure out how to put her on mute, but haven't had much luck muting Chinese women in my life, so...  And my track record of figuring out things in Mandarin is not good.  For example, we regularly blow the fuse in the kitchen whenever the hot water pot, microwave and anything else is in use at the same time.  That means the microwave clock needs to be reset and have yet to figure out the key pad on the machine so have to wait until Betty gets home to do it.

D-U-M-B Everyone's accusin' me!

That picture sucks I know...the kids and I all got new phones a year ago, and when Paul shows up this summer, the camera lens in his phone looks like it was punctured with a nail.  Neither of us are shutter bugs, but he is going to school and I have alternate cameras, so we swapped sim cards and I took his.  That means my photos taken with it suck (unless I am willing to take the point and shoot or detachable lens camera with me, which is not often) and that my summer photos were few and far between.  So as we proceed with the summer travelogue, please bear that in mind.  Speaking of which...

The kids and I all flew on the same flight to SF, but weeks apart, and we all sat in the same seat on the top deck of a 747, which was a first for all of us.  Had always assumed that it was like Heff's grotto up there with velvet couches and crystal chandeleirs, but it isn't any luxury suite unfortunately and the only unusual thing about it is that half of the seats face backward.  We all sat that way and while it didn't freak us out, if felt unusual.

I came a week early for the purpose of taking Mom to Vegas for a couple nights.  We stayed at the Venetian, had awful luck, and ate like kings/pigs/King Pigs.  The slot machines have taken a decidedly Oriental turn in motifs.  Lots of dragons, eights and gold turning on the reels and the ability to play penny slot credits in the very lucky amount of 88 cents.  Mom sat at one and said she would play it in Betty's honor and lost 20 bucks in the process.  There was one set of slots near the bathroom entrance that were linked to a giant video board that would show bonus spin status across the casino floor.  These slots had a money motif and if you got so many Jeffersons or Washingtons, you'd get whatever jackpot.  I sorta loudly declared that we would never play on these slaveholder slot machines and got nary a sideways glance. (Note...said and wrote the previous line before the Trump/Fox News assertion of the same).   I will say that it was here that I saw an example of what makes Vegas, and America so great.  The slots were near the ladies room and Mom takes a long time in there, so got to watch the action a lot, and the Chinese were primarily playing this group, but this time there was a couple of big haired, big bootied Southern 40 somethings at the end and they win.  Something.  With a ton of noise, the video screen lights up and they both stare at it.  A Chinese lady standing behind jumps in and without words, starts interacting with the video and showing them what to do.  It was money falling and you got to keep however many of the dollars you touched.  China and deep South are howling in joy together as they pound the screen  All countries are represented in some form in Vegas and they all come together in the hunt for money.  U-S-A!

I got dragged to Vegas starting as a toddler so have a good 45 years checking in on the scene.  I remember the times when dressing up to hit the casino floor was di rigeur, but now, it is an effin slob fest.  At best, the young 20-somethings dress in their hip garb, which for men this time were fitted button up shirts with humorous prints, the tight short legged pastel shorts, and the smelly beards.  We will all laugh at these dopes while watching "Remember The Teens" documentaries in a couple decades.  The girls don't have as culturally embarrassing a look this go around.  The only people that still do it up classy are the black folks.  The ladies hair and outfits were always done to the hilt, and the fellas came with style.  The rest of you (including me), shame.

Even though I hit a $150 jackpot on a Frogger machine as I waited for her to go to the bathroom before we left for the airport that reduced the pain, we left poorer than when we came.  Was glad Mom could make it and I still felt richer for the time we spent together.  Her head bump and recovery from last November's brain drain seem OK.  Can move around her apartment and keep all her appointments without much help.  Not being allowed to drive kills her...she talks about it often.  Her car hadn't been driven in months and the battery was dead and needed a new one.  She hasn't wanted to admit that she can't drive it any longer but she finally has come around and is willing to let it go.  If you are in the market for a 2003 Nissan 350Z with 42k miles that was literally driven by a little old lady from Pasadena adjacent Arcadia, drop me a line.  It is a super fine looking machine, but I wouldn't want to drive it regularly.  Things are starting to break and it'd be a money pit, but the worst part is that it is so low, that you feel every filled in earthquake crack in the road.  And getting in and out of it has to be as difficult as it was for the Cosmonauts to get into Sputnik.

(Update...she sold it for Blue Book to one of the valets at her place that was in love with it, so win-win)

One of the things she wanted to do was to clean out some of her closets.  She is probably sorry that she asked cause I am ruthless in throwing away stuff.  She barely had time to say goodbye to things before it went to the Goodwill.  The best was clearing out her pantry, which hadn't been done since she moved in 7 years ago.  The reason I know how long she lived there is  that in tossing expired product, about two-thirds of her supply, the oldest expiration date I found was July 2010.  "But it might still be good" she would say to almost everything, but out it went with extreme prejudice. 

In looking at some old documents we were purging, came across this gem.

She has such lovely penmanship and I am gettin' old.

Learned a valuable lesson about age and life this trip.  If you go back a couple of posts, the one where the dog I was "taking care of" died, I mentioned having to carry his paralyzed body to the car.  What I did not mention at the time was that it messed my back up something awful.  I ended up getting an MRI in Seattle and while the doctors gave me a bunch of info about T5 through whatever and ambulatory this and that, what I heard was that even though I have a bulging disc likely caused by the poor lifting technique, no surgery is needed.  But in addition to that, there is significant arthritic deterioration in several vertebrae and the doc said  that I better find a physical therapist to help manage the pain that I will be feeling for the rest of my days.  Swell.  Anyhoo, to simply walk around this summer, had to use a cane often to stay upright.  Other than being a hassle  to lug around, people will start to do things for you, which sounds nice and know they mean well, but it pisses you off.  Not that they are doing you a solid, but they know that you can't do it for yourself.  And you know that you can't do it for yourself, which makes you feel worthless and feeble.  I realized this as my friend Malibu went to wait for my burrito to be made at a rock show in Portland while I sat in the shade.  I resented her for doing something nice for me.  Thought about how cranky my mom gets and that it is probably due to the fact that we are doing things that she could do for herself, or did for herself for 89 years.  Realize that is my fate and will probably be at an earlier age than her. 

This paragraph is to my kids in the future...if I say to you that 'you never told me that', even though you've told me "that" 5 times already, don't get as frustrated at me as I do with my mom?  Please keep the great attitude towards her that you have now when it is your turn to deal with your older mom and me.  Remember the time this trip when we were in the car and we called her and she frantically said "you gotta help me...I lost Google!"  After we laughed, Babydoll calmed her down and so kindly helped her find Google.

Kinda side note...at every instance of something confusing or different, and a majority of times when we would give her good news, like we'll be there for dinner at 5pm, she would reflexively say "youkgh".spent the better part of the summer asking people how to spell that sound.  The one you make when something is unpleasant.  Got a lot of replies and not one was the same.  Kind of a cross between 'yuck', 'ook' and 'ugh'.  Everyone says it but it has no written form.   Ughck?  Not sure what the answer is, either to my spelling, or painful age syndrome.  .

Mentioned that Babydoll had one of her oldest friends down from Seattle to spend 10 days or so with us in SF.  The friend had never been in the area before so tried to show her the sights...GG Bridge, cable cars, etc.  We collected a lot of them but never felt the girls were into it.  Like many 14 year olds, their silence is only broken by eye rolls or scathing commentary.  For example, did the pilgrimage to Lombard Street and their comment was...'so it's a twisty street...is that it?"  I'd like to think that they appreciated the touring  and will leave it at that. 

I do know that Babydoll's friend enjoyed stopping by and taking a photo in front of the Full House house.  Funny what things from the past make it through to the next generations.  One thing I am sure that they both enjoyed was going to the Pride Parade and festival.  As you can guess, SF throws a huge one and the parade itself lasted at least 6 hours...dozens (hundreds?) of companies had huge contingents, lots of  assembly people and other officials, and just loads of every freak the city has to offer gets to fly their flag on this day.  Glitter and feathers galore. 

The best t-shirt I saw said that rhinoceroses are just chubby unicorns.  The girls were asked a couple times if they were a couple.  And nude dudes...many uin-attractive guys just walking around without clothes on.  I get that it is the day to let it all hang out, but you know these tools look for every opportunity to get naked.  Boy Scout jamborees, Thanksgiving, Tuesdays.   Reminded me of my favorite saying about San Francisco...the city where you walk a mile uphill to watch a homeless guy shit in the bushes.  Babydolls friend was delighted to see a character from RuPaul's Drag Race taking photos with the crowd.  Farrah Moan had such lovely skin.

Everyone loves San Francisco.  Great scenery, open minded populace, etc.  Here is the dirty little secret...the place is a shit hole.  The weather is great, unless it's not, which in the "City" is often.  Actually, I like that better than the hot stuff, but still.   Traffic is unbearable, crumbling infrastructure, food is uber-pretentious and priced for tech moguls, and rent has excluded anyone making a normal wage from living anywhere near where they work. Most of the souvenirs play off of their hippie days, which means that that was their cultural peak.  And you'd think that everyone would be tech savvy, but the internet was slow and would brown out often...and no one has a printer that works.  "Who uses paper anymore." I heard condescendingly from non-working printer owners.  Then why do you have a printer that doesn't work?

Way too many people feel it is good form to bring their dogs to restaurants with them.  I know you think your dog is family, you bathe it regularly, whatever, but the hubris on display in this town is astonishing.  I will exaggerate in this space from time to time to make jokes, but I swear that I heard/overheard three times a sentence that started "This might sound elitist, but..."  What followed was certainly that, but do give them credit for self-awareness.

Went to the Sunday Palo Alto Farmer's market a few times, and the food was delish in the vein described above.  The emphasis on organic while admirable, felt a tad pretentious.  The hipster beard guy handing out peach samples said to me as I asked if it was OK to take a second slice, "I'm not the Peach Police brah."  What we could not get our heads around though was the organic gene spliced fruits.

Since when were simple plums, nectarines or peaches not enough for you?  I asked the fruit sommelier on hand how these freaks of science can be considered 'organic'.  Seems like the opposite to me.  Declared that I would never eat these things as they were an affront to God.  The game to come up with the most outrageous combination was on.  The best idea was to grow guacamole and create a Tomocado.

We go there for extended periods every summer, so probably have covered most everything before and may rehash some things, but will throw out some thoughts from the official record anyhoo.

Nearly got sunstroke at an A's game on the hottest day of the year.  While we spent it with dear friends from Taiwan that moved back (and had sumptuous Thai food afterwards...best crispy fish I've ever had), my ass was scorched from sitting on the plastic chair.  I do love the O.co crowd and their 7th inning rendition of 2 Legit 2 Quit is a highlight.

Before my sister left for her trip, we did a run through of the house...spare keys, watering schedule, the usual.  When we're done, they ask if I have any questions.  "Just two, where is the fire extinguisher and the plunger?"  They were not as amused as I.

Since my sister was gone, asked (and she allowed) me to use her car for the month.  Her car was my dad's from 2003 and she got it when he passed away in 2007.  A Lexus SUV, it still drives smooth and is in great condition (she drives like there is some centrifugal force preventing her from reaching the speed limit), but she could do a little better on keeping the inside clean.  She also claims that at times, our dad (who we call Pete-Joe, which is a story for another day) speaks to her from the beyond. Of course I thought that was crazy talk, but am driving about a week into it and I hear his voice.  He says to me..."Tell your sister to clean her damn car once in a while".  Same ol' dad.

Got a note from her this week that she got a bill for $65 bucks for me crossing the Golden Gate Bridge twice.  If you've been there, you'll know there is no way to pay for the toll at the time and that you either have one of their passes or they send you a bill.  They don't mention that it is $32.50 a pop.  Let me get this straight...they charge 30 bucks to cross that rusty death trap?  I've seen a bunch of movies and that thing gets destroyed every other week in the most gruesome ways imaginable.  They should be paying me SAG-AFTRA residuals just to be on it.

We used Google Maps on the phone for every trip.  Many times cause I didn't know the area but for many others, it'll show alternate routes in real time and can help avoid accidents and delays.  Kinda sucks at times cause it routes people to little known shortcuts, but the benefits outweigh...  Babydoll says to me, "How did you ever find places before Google Maps?  I can still look at a map like Jason Bourne, but yeah, another example that I come from  the Greatest Generation.

Speaking of accidents, when the Boy showed up, got tickets for the two of us to hit a Giants game...a little pre-college bonding  and it was a spectacular day and game.  Was against the Marlins and we got to see our beloved 40-something Ichiro.  Again...messed up photos

Going to the game, we get on the freeway where we've been doing so the whole trip, and there is this construction going on with lane shifts, tight merging and inadequate warning signage.   Every time we'd get on I'd say this was a major accident waiting to happen, and on this day, we get on and guess what?  Cars strewn everywhere...on their side, people crying, complete mayhem.  We must have arrived moments after cause the back up was small and no emergency vehicles had arrived, so considered ourselves lucky and myself prescient.

What wasn't lucky was that I parked in front of everyplace everywhere every time.  I know say this often  and the family is so sick of me doing a victory dance every time, but it's all I got, so let me have this.  Anyway, have said for years that it is neither luck nor karma, but a super power and it occurs to me that having a superpower makes me a superhero, and what self respecting superhero doesn't have a catch phrase?   The aforementioned 'Wonder Twins Powers Activate', 'Up, Up and Away' or 'Hulk Smash'.  So I throw it out to the car (kiddies and mom) to help me come up with one for me.  I come up with a couple...not great but we're work shopping at this point.  No one likes my suggestions and mom throws out two.  Yippie! and Hot Dog.  Don't feel it is my style, but the kids pounce and so now, I call 'Yippie!' and the kids respond 'Hot Dog'  Superman has several so am still in the market for one that feels right and am open to suggestion.  Only serious submissions please cause again, let me have this.

While the Boy isn't an aficionado, Babydoll likes music and competes with me to listen to it in the car.  She's into K-Pop these days and the song of the summer (for us...for everyone else it was last year) was Cheer Up by Twice.  Enjoy.

I came up with a seated dance routine to it for the car in the style of Toni Basil.  Once again...enjoy.

A joy of visiting the States is scrolling through the TV channels.  My sister is TV averse but needs a semblance of it for her job and has that weird free TV antenna thing instead of cable and gets the channels designed mainly for the elderly.  No problemo cause every night was rerun fest starting with an hour rock block of Maude, and then some Barney Miller.  The big discovery though was the new Gong Show.  Stumbled onto the premiere episode and laughed my ass off at the acts, especially "Married With Bananas'.  Seriously...watch this all the way to the end.

That is the definition of comedy.  I thought the choice of host was bizarre and didn't know till I read the review the next day that it is Mike Myers in character s Tommy Maitland.  Gonna have to find that bad boy on-line.

Finally, and have no recollection as to why I made this note, but at one point in the 90's. had the idea that I wanted to learn German and enrolled in a class at the local community college.  Didn't learn it obviously, but took away two things.  One, I can say 'Do you have a free room?' (Haben sie ein zimmer frei?).  Second, the word for man is 'herr' and the word for woman is 'frau'.  Think most people know that, but the teacher said that the word 'fraulein' is for an unmarried female and she would never use that term, nor should we as no female should need to be married to become a woman.  Sage advice

August 18th, 2017

So hot.  Please remind me when I fall into the "Taiwan is a good place to live" trope, usually around January/February when the weather has been tolerable, that this place totally sucks from May to October?

This past week was all about Midnight Oil.  As a refresher...they haven't toured since 2002 and their run through the States this go around missed our visit by that much, so was delighted when they announced an Asian date on their world tour.  Of course Taiwan wasn't on the agenda, but Singapore is only 5 hours away by plane and not too pricey with budget airlines, so this became a top priority for the annual rock and roll pilgrimage.

Since Betty and the Boy are in Charlottesville, had to make it quick as Babydoll is in school.  We have a 22 year old cousin of Betty's living with us this summer, so there was adult supervision.  Wanted to fly in that day, see the show and bail out as soon as possible.  The flight out of Singapore the next day was 9am, so not too bad, but the only one to get me there before show time was a plane that left at 10 past midnight.  Apparently, budget airlines aren't so hot at updating delays, and when I arrived promptly 2 hours before the flight, learned that it was delayed and wouldn't leave until 2:40AM.

Quick tangent...why do people have so many kids then suck at parenting?  Waiting in the (long) line to check in, am near this family (not Chinese), and they are a swirling mass of chaos.  First noticed them when the mom, complete with huge ass, cuts perpendicular through the line, which had turned snake like on itself four times, to get to her brood.  The next 30 minutes, all of the clan, their total number still unknown cause they were a blur, but at least 5 kids, were in and out of line in all directions, crashing into people and things while on their phones, talking nonsense, while the parents were either pretending not to notice, or were just oblivious.  It culminates with one of their precious offspring crashing into one of those line dividers, the kind that will unzip like an evil tape measure when undone, and whacks the frailest of old Taiwanese ladies.  Not even an acknowledgment or apology from any of them.  We're all on the same plane and when they get on board (at 2:30am mind you), every single one of them bangs the other passengers with their gear as they go down the aisle like the stewardess with her guitar from Airplane

What are you gonna do?  Vasectomy's are painless and cheap...

One more tip for the airport for ya.  When you get your boarding pass, put it in your passport in the page with your picture and info.  At every security checkpoint, I get behind the guy who hands it over like he is Sir Walter Raleigh and it takes several  precious seconds while the checker dude/chick has to find the page.  Multiply that by 150 passengers and we'd all get to where we want to go that much faster no?  Go one step further and had it over to them open.  Why does this kinda stuff bug me so much?  And who the hell is Sir Walter Raleigh?

Hit Singapore at 7am and the show is at 8pm.  Luckily, Singapore has a great airport which has a couple of decent transit hotels you can book to stay for a few hours to freshen up/snooze between flights.  Got one for 7 hours, took a long sleep and even jumped in their pool.  Very nice.

The show was on the other side of town, but the metro went directly from the airport to the venue. What hits you as you engage with the population is the racial diversity.  Tons of Asians, Indians and westerners, hijabs and sideways baseball caps, all sharing the same spaces equally.   Had been to Singapore before so didn't need to sight see, and am sure I detailed how great the place is on that visit, but the place really is fantastic.  Extremely well planned and clean, interesting architecture,  food options galore, and everyone speaks English.  The venue was in a new development where the theatre was on the 5th floor of a mall that had cuisine of all kinds.  And nice shopping...like a converse store and super hip musical instrument shop.  Stepped into that to touch the guitars, and of course, the guitar players from Midnight Oil were in there checking it out too.  Now am obviously a huge fanboy and so cannot approach them cause I'd be all 'love you man'.

The venue, called the Star Theatre, was 5000 seats and very tasteful for a new facility.  Was on-line to get tix at the opening bell and found a seat in the second row.  A handicapped one so there was no one between me and the stage.  Pretty happy with myself at this point

Another solo attendee sits next to me and we share Oils stories...she was about my age from Australia and we talked about our kids and travels.  Even for one that hates talking to strangers, it was quite nice.  We both shared a love of Sri Lanka as being a hidden gem to visit.  She is planning to retire there.

We also talk about Singapore and specifically...will the crowd get up and rush the stage?  Even though it is almost exclusively Aussies in attendance, the reputation of Singaporean authorities love of order may rule the day.

Forgive me if I repeat myself for a minute, but I love Midnight Oil.  They were massive in Australia suring my exchange student year there in 1983 (Men At Work had taken over the world at the time, but they were a bit of a joke 'Down Under')  Their best album (in my and many people's opinion) 10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1 came out late in '82 and they were playing stadiums in Australia at the time.  Fell in love with that disc at first listen and our love for each other has only grown since.   Still the best show I ever saw was them in DC in the Spring of '84 at the tiny Bayou in Georgetown, and have seen them every chance I got since...so at least a dozen times.  Still, I know of no one in my circle that is even remotely in love with them as I.  Would talk folks into going to the shows with me, but have found it hard to convert or even talk about them without people  either rolling their eyes or saying that they are too political.

Political is an understatement.  9 out of 10 political songs is not fair.  They have 5 tunes out of a couple hundred that aren't protesting something or other.  And not just protesting...hardcore name checking racism or corporate greed.  They famously drove a flatbed tractor trailer in front of Exxon HQ in NYC after the Valdez and rocked 5th Ave.  Whatever...I never come to music for lyrics anyway.  It is the power and fury of the music that drew me in.  Most people identify the singer as the huge bald guy that dances unlike anyone you've ever seen.  The bass player is rock solid and the drummer is as frenetic and driving as they make 'em, but it is the twin guitar assault that is the signature sound for me and I bought my seat to be in front of the one (Jim Moginie) that is the genius (in my opinion) of the band. 

They sound like no one else, and I was thinking of who to compare them to and came up with U2.  The predate them and bet that U2 wishes they could not only rock as hard as the Oils, but that they had the cajones to take a stand without fear of alienating their base.  I like U2, they put on a pretty show and girls seem to like them, but in this seasoned observers view, Midnight Oil is on another level.

So they come out and launch into Redneck Wonderland.  Blistering, and no one moves from their seat.  I am literally on the edge of mine ready to pounce and see the bouncers in front with arms folded.  C'mon people.  Peter Garret (the vocalist and chief provocateur) says that "we're a dance band", and we all make our move.  I step right up in front to Jim's monitor and pedals and get my ears (face/mind/soul) blown for the next two hours.

A great set (you can see the song list here).  Took some snaps...such an amazing night.

That's my water bottle...posed it for context.  Such an auteur...

Not that I need to defend my rock bona fides, but after the show, metro-ed it back to the airport, found some quiet corner and slept on the floor until it was time to board the plane back to TPE. 

One more airport observation...is it just me, or does every arriving flight disembark at the gate furthest from customs?

August 13th, 2017

Quick drop to weigh in on Charlottesville.  Have received several notes voicing concern on the Boy heading there to go to school, and Betty said my mom, dedicated Fox News devotee that she is, called her freaking out about it. 

While the deaths that happened today are alarming, have no fear for him.  I don't recall everything I put in this space, and rarely go back cause I'd guess some of it is cringe worthy, but know that a detailing of the thought process that went into his going there was discussed.  It came down to a coin flip between a school in Boston and UVA, and while UVA was a superior choice, Northeastern had some very appealing pros.  Their work study year and that he had a few friends going to NE were big draws.

In my mind, and in much of the advice from the people he sought out in the process, the fact that UVA is located on the southern side of the Mason-Dixon line and Virginia is a swing state offers an opportunity to be part of the real discussion (and hopefully the real solution) as to what is dividing the country.  That it would soon, like the next week, become ground zero in the fight for the soul of America was just happenstance.

I don't fear for his safety.  Well maybe a little.  But I truly hope he gets out there and lends his voice and presence to the right side of history.  That he engages in discussions around the lunch table to share his experiences of living in a foreign culture, of knowing Muslims and people of color so as to lessen the demonization of the "other" and to encourage others by example to search out the good while looking for ways to narrow our divide.

 My university years were spent living in Washington DC entirely under the Reagan administration, and while it was hardly as divisive a time as it is now, the lines were clear.  We stood outside the South African embassy to protest apartheid and we debated long into the night/morning the merits of trickle down economics.  We thought we were changing the world and maybe in some ways we did.

That Boy-o is walking into this space at this time in history is so fortuitous.  Not to put too much pressure, but we're all counting on you.

August 11th, 2017

Hey there.

Some of us made it back to Taipei this week.  Babydoll started her Freshman year of High School on Thursday and I brought her back.  The Boy and Betty stayed in the States as she is gonna take him back to move into his dorm in a week or so.

This is the start of our 6th year in Taiwan.  Funny that no one asks us about it anymore on our visits, and have nothing much new to say about it anyway.  Most of the conversations when meeting up with friends took the same track; before we delved into whatever happened in the past year, there would be a feeling out about how fucked up the current administration is.  Realized this was so we could determine if anyone was an (insert your term here), and once it was found to be safe harbor, we could move on to playing 'do you remember?" and hear about the status of our lives.

After 5 years of posting in this space, felt that I have exhausted every euphemism and description as to how miserably hot it is.  Nothing can prepare one for stepping into this shit in August after being away for a couple months.  The heat followed us unrelentingly on our trip to the States. Will go into some events in later posts, but we (literally) burnt our asses at a baseball game in Oakland, cursed my father-in-law for not having a tree near his plot for shade as we visited his grave site in LA, hid as best we could from triple digit temps for a week straight in the DMV (DC/Maryland/Virginia), and Seattle experienced some of their highest temps on record along with air quality that prevented us from seeing Rainer even once.  Some massive brush fires in British Colombia made the air a choking soup.  Still, at no point did  any of the heat we felt this summer compare to what is going on here.  Two days before we got here, they recorded the highest temperature ever, and it has barely lowered since.  Official temps in the low hundreds, but the "real feel" each day has hit 115 for the better part of the afternoon.  And the nights "feel" never goes below 90.  Looking ahead, the same is predicted as far as the forecast allows.  Miserable and painful.  

Add the inevitable brain scramble a complete flip of the clock has on circadian rhythms, and am simply not capable of rational thought, so am anticipating this space will be a bit disjointed for the next few weeks.  Enjoy the train wreck that ensues.

Will try to disseminate the funny things that happened last couple of months later on, and next week will be all about Midnight Oil, who I am going to see in Singapore next Wednesday, but want to share one thing today.

This trip, we spent most of it in SF watching my mom, and the dog that I mentioned last time, so we had limited Seattle time.  We were able to see (almost) everyone precisely one time, usually for some fabulous food.  Since our time with folks was limited to a few hours, got to tell my stories over and over in almost performance art style.  Near the end of our time, I went to Portland for a couple of days/nights of rock and roll at a festival there called Pickathon (where they naturally had searing temps).  The Boy has a "special" friend living down there and he took the opportunity to go see her by driving down with me.  The family he visited  just moved back to the States from Taiwan and we arranged to all have brunch on Sunday before I headed out to the shows.  We had a great meal (at the Screen Door...if you're in PDX, check it out).  But at the end of the meal, realized that I was not gonna see Paul again before he starts university and wouldn't get together again until Christmas.

We hugged it out and said 'smell you later'.  If you know me at all, am not an overly emotional character.  But as I was driving away, felt kinda weird.  Not sad or weepy, but more confused.  When we reconvened with friends in Seattle and I was telling my tales, tried to add the 'saying goodbye to your eldest' into the routine.  I couldn't get a sentence out before getting choked up and bailing on the premise.  As I write this, am getting that same feeling in the back of my throat.  Am totally jealous of him...he seems smart, has an attitude towards life that I envy, and is embarking on an experience where the world is open to him.  I do not say this cause he is my boy, nor do I take any credit for his character, but he is simply a good guy.  

June 30th, 2017

Wasn't planning on posting for the summer, but need to share.  As you recall, came to Palo Alto this summer and we're staying here for a month.  My sister had plans to take a trip to South Africa for several weeks and we came to watch her dog (Ollie) and keep an eye on my mom.  Pretty uneventful so far...first took mom to Vegas for a couple nights and then settled into a routine with the dog and house siting.  Must say that apartment life has its advantages.  Watering plants, taking out the many trash bins and all the other pleasantries of home responsibility are overrated.

Walking the dog has been fun though and makes me want one.  His hour and a half walk in the morning fits with my routine and other than a taste for cat poop, he is a pleasure.  Having a dog that loves to eat cat poop is like having a close (male) friend that loves Coldplay.  You still love them unconditionally, but it throws into question every personal decision they make cause ultimately, it's shit.   Even don't mind the 30 minute evening stroll as the weather is so delightful.  Yesterday, took my mom, Babydoll and her friend from Seattle that is visiting this week to the Korean chicken wing place (BonChon) to scratch that itch.  I got the spicy and everyone else had the glazed.  No one was injured this year.  The last time I took my mom there, her nose started bleeding in the car ride home.  The sign of a truly great wing.  We got home, fed Ollie and the girls took him out for his nightly constitutional.  They went to the park and threw the ball a few times...they reported that someone asked how old Ollie was and when they said he was 10, they were surprised as they thought he was a puppy.  They took some videos of him running and wagging and drinking from the water fountain that are classic, but can't figure out to share them at this point as this isn't my normal computer and will try when we get home.  Suffice to say, they are joyous.

We all settled into our nightly wind down activities with the girls cackling at K-Pop videos, me watching TV (the new Gong Show is fantastic) and Ollie stretched out beside me.

I got up in the morning and Ollie was downstairs when I went to start the coffee pot.  As I hit the kitchen, I stepped in something wet and saw Ollie had massively puked.  The amount of poop he produces in a day makes me envious, but paled when compared to the amount he threw up.  He was lying nearby and didn't think much of it cause he is old and am told he pukes often (I mentioned his affinity for cat poop/Coldplay, yes?)  So I cleaned up the sick and then opened the door so he could take a pee...and he didn't move.  He sorta tried but didn't.  Tried to cajole him and could then tell something was seriously wrong with his leg cause he struggled to get up and couldn't.  Again...he had a limp the other day and heard that was not uncommon, and thought maybe he pulled something.  When I tried to help him up, his back legs just wouldn't work.

I got out the house instruction sheet and looked up the vet they use.  They were to open in 10 minutes, so lifted him up fireman style and put him in the back of the SUV.  He is a big lab, would guess he is about 90 pounds, and getting them there was not easy and my respect for firemen was enhanced.

Got to the vet and they take a look at him.  The Doggie Doc threw out some possibilities (a type of canine stroke called FCE and tick paralysis) and said they would run some blood and other tests for a couple hours.  When they called back, they were still thinking it was doggy stroke but that I had to take him to a neurologist cause they just didn't know..

All the while, am communicating/talking to my sister and brother-in-law, who are in some camp in a game preserve in South Africa, via WhatsApp.  They keep saying they are sorry I have to deal and I feel awful cause I broke their dog.

We get to the specialist and their prognosis is not good.  This new doctor thinks it is something to do with his spine...an injury or tumor...as his back legs are paralyzed.  They wouldn't say it, but if I read people's faces well at all, they don't look encouraged.  They say that just to take and evaluate the MRI, it is gonna be $4000.  Not only $3000 for the MRI, but an $686 estimate for the neurologist to review the images.  Then, depending on the prognosis, it would be about $1000 a day to hospitalize him, and any procedure needed would be on top of that.  I've had similar personal experiences with a pooch, when you are looking at age, prognosis and the costs, and it is just a brutal conversation.  One of the hardest ones anyone will ever have and that you will turn over in your mind forever.  I have my sister on the phone with the doctor and the call is made to put him to sleep.

After some paperwork, they put me in a room and then brought Ollie in.  By this point, they had doped him up and he was lying there glassy eyed.  Held his head while they gave him the drugs and it was over in about 30 seconds.  In all of this, he did not cry nor did it seem that he was in pain or distress.  The same cannot be said for me and am sure that my sister and brother are feeling it.  Cannot stand being maudlin, nor is existentialism in my DNA, but I have never seen something die in front of me.  Holding his head while they pumped him first with a sedative, and then with the stuff that stopped his heart...soul crushing. 

We've no idea what happened.  He was his usual self last night and incapacitated completely by morning.  I keep running through all of the events and cannot think of anything happened that would have caused injury, but suspect that I will revisit this day in my mind forever looking for an answer.   I feel so awful.  He was a good boy...

June 3rd, 2017

Gabba Gabba Hey,

I got the video of a red/light/red traffic light.  I only took video of one light sequence and caught this gem.

Showed this to a couple people and they were not as outraged as I, but to be fair they usually aren't.  While the focus was on the light, unsurprisingly caught three traffic violations that are not immediately noticeable.  First, a truck barrels through a red light without slowing down.  Hard to tell from the angle but he doesn't even tap the brakes as he goes through the light.  To be honest, as this occurs at almost every light every time, not sure if it'd count as an infraction, but have to hope so.  The other two illegal moves are the cars that he almost hits.  They are coming out the wrong way of a one  way connector spur as they make an illegal U-turn instead of taking a minute to go down the road to the proper place to do so. .  I know I complain a lot about the drivers here, but I could take a 30 second video of any intersection and would be able to find something you'd consider road rageable in easily 1 out of 3 of them.

This is gonna be the last entry for a couple months as I head to the States on Thursday.  First to the Bay area to house/dog sit for my sister/take Mom to Vegas, then a week in the DMV (DC/Maryland/Virginia) for UVA orientation and some baseball, then a couple weeks in Seattle.  If you're not on the calendar, better reach out soon.

Am equal parts intrigued and apprehensive about this trip.  Just from watching stuff on-line, the discourse in the States these days feels toxic.  Insulated here as most expats are world wise and therefore, incredulous at the current administration, and think that my peer group in the States is overwhelmingly the same, but know that we're gonna hit some pockets of Fox News devotees along the way.  What will be different is when we take in the daily nuttiness.  As we are the complete opposite time wise from the East coast and that the scandalous reveal of the day happens while we are sleeping, every morning is like Twisted Christmas.

Not much going on around here other than Spring cleaning, getting The Boy ready for school (and prepping our new guest room...come visit), and saying so long to departing friends. Year 5 of this stupid dance and in addition to the annual migration of a  bunch of good ones, we are losing our best friends this year.  We had our last dinner with them last night, and while it was crude levity as usual, their departure, along with The Boy heading off for a life of his own, makes the prospects of life here less appealing.  That is too soft...fucking grim is what it feels like.  I know we will see them again and will fall in like so many old friends that we live far from but see every so often, but it'll never be the same.  I love those guys and my soul hurts.  Ugh.

It was Dragon Boat Festival this week and it is quite a big deal apparently.  A 4-day weekend, events all around town and caught me totally unawares.  5 years in and how have I completely missed this thing?  The answer is, and it is always the answer, the dumb ass lunar calendar.  This is as early as it gets and as we typically bug out at the end of school/first sign of flying cockroaches, have missed it previously, The Dragon Boat Festival is on the 5th pagan day of the 5th pagan month and is said to celebrate fealty and filial piety.  Had to look both those words up...fealty is subservience from vassal to lord, and filial piety is respect for ones parents/elders.  I have mixed feelings on both.

Follow-up to last weeks money talk...looked up the definition of spondulix as a slang for money, and it is an old English term that refers to a shell that used to be used as currency. Used it on a British couple the other day and while it took them a second, they knew the term.   While it is a bit clunky to say, and sounds better in an English accent, I like it and gonna try to work it in.

Follow-up on last weeks note about Paul's testimonial in the yearbook to his lunch table.  Took this at graduation...here is the table along with all his J-O buddies that called it home the last four years.

Graduation was a nice ceremony but was not an emotional roller coaster as expected/feared, mainly cause there was a 30 minute speech at the beginning that took the air out of the room.  In the original Total Recall movie with Arnold Schwarzenegger, near the end he gets deposited on the surface of Mars without his space suit and his eyes start popping out.  For those of you that love that movie, you know what I'm talking about...for the rest of you, about 55 seconds in.

It's been good times with you Boy-o...and you look really tall in these photos.

An article from HuffPo popped up in my FB this week feed about why it is hard to talk to people about our travels.  No surprises here, but reading this article makes me understand how pompous it can sound and I promise not to share unless asked. 

Finally for this semester, did you take the Myers/Briggs test I shared last week?

As for me, my measurables include being 61% extrovert to 39% introvert and  80/20 observant to intuitive, which both feel about right.  The one that hurt the most, but is both telling and obvious is that I rated as 88% judgmental against 12% "prospecting".  They make it sound better than it is..."Judging individuals are decisive, thorough and highly organized. They value clarity, predictability and closure, preferring structure and planning to spontaneity." 

You can dig really deep in the analysis and there were no surprises for me.  Where I see value is seeing other people's results as it gives insight as to how to accommodate them in ways that could be beneficial to all concerned.  If I was a boss, I'd want to have all my employees take this, but have a feeling it would be considered illegal.  For instance, knowing how I like order in my life above almost all else, you could easily play along so as to not aggravate me unnecessarily.  A good example is kitchen towels.  I have a system as to how they are put in the closet and rotated by color so that they are all used equally over time.  I have tried to explain this to Betty but can see immediately that she tunes out immediately.  It is unimportant, and ridiculous with a dusting of OCD, but it is almost a religious rite for me.  How hard would it be to humor me on kitchen towels?  Once you do, we can move onto sponge etiquette.  Knowing a person's hard wired obsessions should make it easier to understand and relate to them, and if they really rubbed you the wrong way, you could back away slowly.

For the record, I am an ESTJ personality type, which they call the Executive.  There is a lot of things in here, but will share the strengths and weaknesses below.  Tell me this doesn't describe me perfectly...

The Good?

Dedicated – Seeing things to completion borders on an ethical obligation for ESTJs. Tasks aren’t simply abandoned because they’ve become difficult or boring – people with the ESTJ personality type take them up when they are the right thing to do, and they will be finished so long as they remain the right thing to do.

Strong-willed – A strong will makes this dedication possible, and ESTJs don’t give up their beliefs because of simple opposition. ESTJs defend their ideas and principles relentlessly, and must be proven clearly and conclusively wrong for their stance to budge.

Direct and Honest – ESTJs trust facts far more than abstract ideas or opinions. Straightforward statements and information are king, and ESTJ personalities return the honesty (whether it’s wanted or not).

Loyal, Patient and Reliable – ESTJs work to exemplify truthfulness and reliability, considering stability and security very important. When ESTJs say they’ll do something, they keep their word, making them very responsible members of their families, companies and communities.

Enjoy Creating Order – Chaos makes things unpredictable, and unpredictable things can’t be trusted when they are needed most – with this in mind, ESTJs strive to create order and security in their environments by establishing rules, structures and clear roles.

Excellent Organizers – This commitment to truth and clear standards makes ESTJs capable and confident leaders. People with this personality type have no problem distributing tasks and responsibilities to others fairly and objectively, making them excellent administrators.

And the Bad...

Inflexible and Stubborn – The problem with being so fixated on what works is that ESTJs too often dismiss what might work better. Everything is opinion until proven, and ESTJ personalities are reluctant to trust an opinion long enough for it to have that chance.

Uncomfortable with Unconventional Situations – ESTJs are strong adherents to tradition and when suddenly forced to try unvetted solutions, they become uncomfortable and stressed. New ideas suggest that their methods weren’t good enough, and abandoning what has always worked before in favor of something that may yet fail risks their image of reliability.

Judgmental – ESTJs have strong convictions about what is right, wrong, and socially acceptable. ESTJs’ compulsion to create order often extends to all things and everyone, ignoring the possibility that there are two right ways to get things done. ESTJs do not hesitate to let these "deviants" know what they think, considering it their duty to set things right.

Too Focused on Social Status – ESTJs take pride in the respect of their friends, colleagues and community and while difficult to admit, are very concerned with public opinion. ESTJs (especially Turbulent ones) can get so caught up in meeting others’ expectations that they fail to address their own needs.

Difficult to Relax – This need for respect fosters a need to maintain their dignity, which can make it difficult to cut loose and relax for risk of looking the fool, even in good fun.

Difficulty Expressing Emotion – This is all evidence of ESTJs’ greatest weakness: expressing emotions and feeling empathy. People with the ESTJ personality type get so caught up in the facts and most effective methods that they forget to think of what makes others happy, or of their sensitivity. A detour can be breathtakingly beautiful, a joy for the family, but ESTJs may only see the consequence of arriving at their destination an hour late, hurting their loved ones by rejecting the notion too harshly.

Would love to read about you "Deviants".  

Talk soon.