October 15, 2012

In the tour guides for Taipei, always at or near the top of the list of things to do are the Night Markets.  To quote..."From snacks to laptops, Taipei's after-dark markets teem with goods.".  Last weeks posting described our visit to the local Shilin market as underwhelming.  Yesterday, we had a visitor in town with a free night, so decided to go to the oldest and (seemingly) most famous one called Huaxi, aka Snake Alley.  In the old days, you could get a lovely meal of turtle soup and fresh snake stew, wash it down with an assertive, but not too pushy, deer penis wine, followed by a romp with some local girl for hire.  It was touted that the "city fathers" have cleaned it up some and now is promoted as a top tourist destination. 

In reality, the place rivaled Disneyland as the unhappiest place on Earth.   The setting was along the Dahan River in a desolate and dark neighborhood...very dirty and had the look of being old with the common areas and ornate arches not being lovingly maintained.  The street food, usually delicious around town, was downright nasty.  We had over-roasted mushy peanuts and soggy onion pancakes.  Our usual go-to favorite, crispy chicken, had little tiny bones in it.  We posited various alternatives as to what kind of meat it really was with possibilities including rat, cat paws and crow. 

A handful of the "snake alley" establishments were also retained.  The customers (older dudes) all had this glazed vacant expression...would describe it as a person who had long ago sold his soul.  Each place had an equally seedy guy out front with a microphone enticing potential customers in an eerie monotone to come on in.  If that wasn't enough motivation for you to check it out, sitting on the counters out front were some of the offerings including live snakes, jars full of what Betty called chicken gonads, and de-shelled turtles lying on their backs with their legs still kicking.  Brutal.  I do think you could still find a "date" though...the problem was that they hadn't gotten a new crop of professional gals since the 60's. 

I had my camera, but was not motivated to take pictures as the vendors and customers were emotionless and seemed sad...managed to get only one snap and it was this of this "fresh" vegetable vendor.  Pretty much says it all.