In the building where we live, as is typical in most apartment buildings here, there is a guard that monitors the entrance. Our building has three pedestrian and one vehicle entrance, so there are about a dozen guards total that rotate assignments. Some of them last for years and others only a few months and they engage us in varying degrees. A couple of them jump up from the desk when they see a resident coming and push the elevator buttons to call it while others will just nod. One thing they all do when stationed at the garage entrance is they will come to the door to see who is driving and wave. Appreciate the security and will wave back every time, but there is one guy that goes to another level. Whenever we come into the garage or front door, with his left arm he will throw this salute.
Not great quality cause I took it while moving, but it is a total Heil Hitler pose. When he is standing, will click his heels together when performing it. Analytical me understands he is just being demonstrative in his greeting, but since we are living in a conspiratorial epoch, could he be giving me the ol' Heil salute? I am one of the only white fellas in the building. And if so, is he throwing it out in solidarity or is he secretly mocking me? The Naizi's appropriated a bunch of Buddhist imagery and this could be a religious thing. Probably best not to ask
Briefly and relatedly, I am sure I have shared my 33%/66% theory before, but basically it is that 2/3 of the people out there are convinced of at least one conspiracy theory and you should back away from them slowly. It's easy to identify the ones getting it from Fox News, but this absolutely crosses all gender, race, cultural, etc. boundaries. Feels like we are ticking up and that it is now 75%. What do the rest of us do with them? Reason and rationality don't work. Everyone says that they just avoid whatever the "subject" is but that simply kicks the can down the road. I'm a fan of direct confrontation and shame and if they don't like it, fuck 'em...life is too short to have them in it.
So last week I gave a family update and said some decent things about the kids. If they ever read this, they will likely skip over the next post cause they heard positive stuff. Therefore, it is safe to hide a very concerning feeling in this entry. I think Babydoll has some form of mania and worry not about her safety, but those of others. Here are a couple of examples. TOday was her second to last exam and it was at 2pm, but she asked me to drive her over as she was gonna help a classmate study. She said that this person has bad study habits and waits to the last minute to cram the info into their brain for the test and how that is not the right way to study. Scary right? That is the only way normal people study and have never known anyone to do so otherwise. On its own, I suppose I could ignore it, but without any prompting, she sends me this picture from her notebook the other day with the message, "that's a pretty good larynx"
Something got messed up this week. I wrote the above a few days earlier and on SUnday went in to clean it up and add a spiel about how this virus is killing my mom. Not that she has it, but how she is losing her mind due to being quarantined for the last two plus months. It went deep into details and darkness. For whatever reason, I could not get this program to acknowledge or save any of that and do not have the emotional energy to try to recreate it. It was good to get it out of my brain and my suggestion at the end for all of us to share this stuff with others cause it helps to unburden your own mind and is good to know that others are going through some shit too.
Will cut this short this week then. Hopefully will be able to find some funny over the next few days.
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