Heard about a new sub-ethnic group of Chinese this week called the Hakka. If you read the Wiki definition of them, you'll find they are a proud and influential group that has contributed much to Chinese history. The resentment must come from the fact that they are migratory and settle in other provinces. We were having lunch with a friend here (Mexican raised in Canada) that married into a Hakka family, and he was going off on his Hakka mother-in-law. Really wish I had a recording of it as he described how truly horrible, mean and cheap she is...hilarious. Always complaining he doesn't make enough money, spent her husbands entire pension on new teeth forcing him to go back to work at half pay, eating rotten vegetables so as not to waste money buying fresh ones, and so on. They were described as equal parts gypsy, Mexican and Jewish...even the word Hakka cannot be said without total contempt. Try it...it's fun.
While we're on the stereotype run, heard a good one about "Asian" eyes. Obviously, there is a scientific aspect to why the structure of the eyes in Asia are genetically different that those in other parts of the world. But as usual, the man on the street can simplify it in such a way as to make the world make perfect sense. We were talking about the difference between the different Asian countries, along how they all look the same line, and heard this...you can tell the difference between them as the edges of Japanese eyes go up, Korean eyes go straight across, and Chinese go down. So simple, but upon closer inspection...so true. The Chinese, due to the geographic size are much more diverse (of course), but all in all, I have noticed this to be true. Will save some of my other observartions about the Japanese and Koreans for another day.
Went to the final book discussion group at the kids school last Thursday. The book is called How To Talk So Your Kids Will Listen (And How To Listen So Your Kids Will Talk). I have recommended this book in a previous post, but I love this book so much that have to do so again. The lessons on how to deal with people, not just kids, are so simple yet work so well. I catch myself a lot not doing what it promotes, and then seeing how the conversation turns negative, but the instant you start to talk/listen in the way the book describes, the person you are dealing with attitude changes immediately and positively. True genius...if you read one book this year, I would consider this one.
So anyway, we were talking about differences between Western and Chinese culture with respect to families and how they take care of their elders. Again, it's a stereotype, but in the West, children aren't expected to take in their elder parents, while in Asia, it is the expectation that you not only take care of them, but take them into your home. I've noticed that the while the Chinese have friends, that they do more social things with their families than with their friends. From my experience, I love my family deeply, but also consider my friends to be part of my family and treat them exactly (if not better) than my own family sometimes. The consensus in the group (equal parts Chinese and Western) was this was true but that the Chinese were becoming more "Westernized" in this respect. I was asked what my feeling/expectation was about my own kids taking care of me in my old age and it was my feeling that while I did not expect them to take care of me, I would hope that I raised them to want to do so.
Carolyn's class has had a swimming unit the last few weeks. The whole class goes to the pool three times a week and learns basic swimming safety skills, and yesterday, the parents were invited to come watch what they had been learning. Very practical lessons on how to wear and use a life vest.
How to dive, etc.
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