Gomez Diaries: Week of May 2nd, 2014

There is something about the concept of "saving face" that is bugging me. Not yet ready or able to articulate it, but have been thinking about it a lot. How say you?

Alrighty...Vietnam then. We didn't get from the airport to the hotel without three characteristics of Hanoi becoming completely clear. Driving in from the airport, the first thing that you notice is how slow everyone drives. Not a kilometer over the speed limit. It is not like they are orderly drivers as intersections are complete chaos...just chaos in slow motion. We learned that the local authorities are serious about nabbing speeders and saw it first hand on our drive to and from Halong Bay. Every time a car would speed by, moments later we would see them pulled over by the cops. Way different that Taiwan where scofflaws seem only punished via traffic cams. It is a point of contention to some, but in my book, the Taiwanese are still the biggest a-hole drivers due to their proclivity to make dangerous and illegal moves to get ahead of the pack, and the attitude of everyone else that that's OK. Do you know the difference between a vacuum and a scooter in Taiwan? The position of the dirt bag. You can replace "scooter in Taiwan" with Donald Sterling's Clipper seats by the way

The second thing you notice are the power lines.

Like Sideshow Bob waking up after a long night of drinking. They are incredibly dangerous and from the sheer volume of them around, the government's goal of burying them all by 2015 looks unlikely. I found them mesmerizing and it would seem the locals find them as a source of pride as they sell t-shirts emblazoned with their image.

Third, the city is crawling with what I would politely call Western bohemians. The hotel we were staying was in the middle of the Old Quarter, and it is closed to vehicle traffic on weekends as the streets are packed with people sitting on small plastic chairs drinking locally "crafted" beer on the sidewalks (and street). Pretty cool actually...very social atmosphere and the beer is cheap, something like 50 cents for a big bottle. With the streets closed, we had to walk a few blocks from the main street to the hotel, and at these sidewalk bars, drinking with the locals was a sizeable chunk of Westerners in their smelly hippie garb. Rastafarian colored clothes, no shoes and hair that looked like the power poles overhead. We concluded that Vietnam is a mecca for the low budget traveler as it is so unbelievably inexpensive there. I have zero problem with that, it just feels that their poor look seemed too well crafted.

As mentioned, Hanoi was just rated as number 8 on TripAdvisors list of popular tourist destinations. I think it has to do more with the affordability of the city along with the proximity to many interesting sites nearby than it does with the amount of stuff to do in the city proper. The city is quite nice, just not as spectacular as many of the other cities listed further down on the list (like Paris?). The downtown core is very dense so you could basically walk to any major site in no more than 30 minutes. On our first day, we hired a couple of Cyclo's to drive us around the Old Quarter. Cyclos are two seater carts powered by a bicycle and an hours ride cost $2 each.

One of the great things about being able to travel around so much is seeing how each destination solves their transportation needs so differently. The Old Quarter is about 10 square blocks big and each street is dedicated to a different product. Kitchen ware on one street, toys on another, or government propaganda.

We had our Cyclo drivers drop us off at the Hanoi end of the Long Bien Bridge. At the time of the Vietnam War, this was the only bridge connecting the city with the ports and the Americans dropped 100's of tons of bombs trying to knock it out, but never could, so it is a place of national pride. It was designed and constructed by the same team that built the Eiffel Tower.

As we were walking back from the bridge, we passed in front of a police station that had a big board in front that was warning against the dangers of scooter riding. There were a good 30 "after" pictures of scooter accidents that were pretty horrific.

The heart of Hanoi is Hoan Kiem Lake. A small lake dead center in town, it borders the Old Quarter on the North and the French Quarter to the South, it is the spot where the locals can go to hang. We passed by it several times on our walks and always saw stuff going on...ballroom dancing, lovers doing what lovers do, or people playing the local version of hacky sack where a badminton shuttlecock is used instead.

At one end is a small island the houses a temple where you can light some incense and chill. They also have the mummified remains of a giant turtle that was found in the lake a few years back.

The history of the lake is quite interesting and is one of those places that every city needs.

The French Quarter has bigger streets and is not as interesting as the old quarter, but there is a nice Opera House in French design, and we treated ourselves to a nice lunch at the Metropole Hotel. It was the luxury French colonial hotel from 1901 and they have restored it to its glory. Think Raffles Hotel in Singapore. Nice sandwiches and old time service made for a pleasant respite from our walking tour. Caught this couple posing for wedding pictures...she took one look at me and as you can see, was having second thoughts.

Lovely. I was expecting the Vietnamese to look like extras in a Charlie Sheen/Michael J. Fox movie about the War, but felt that they looked very Chinese to me. The history of Vietnam is deeply tied with the Chinese on their northern border so their appearance as Chinese looking is not a surprise (Donals Sterling told me we'll all look like them one day). I understand they look very different in the south and hope to report on that one day.

One morning, we got up early to go stand in line to see Ho Chi Minh's embalmed remains. We went on a Wednesday and the line was long. Sorta wanted to bail, but it started moving and the wait was about 45 minutes. Like Magic Mountain, where they show Looney Tunes cartoons while you wait in line (pure genius), they would show movies about the life of Unkie Ho. The Americans do not come out well in those. Once you get into the mausoleum, you do a semi-circle path around his body. Apparently, he wanted to be cremated and his remains spread in his village, but the government disobeyed his wishes and had the Russians come in and use their expertise to do the preservation thing. I thought he looked pretty good, but Betty said he looked worse than he did a decade before when she visited. Photography is strictly prohibited. Afterwards, we went out front to take a few snapshots of the mausoleum and we lucked into this scene of a huge pack of women dressed in pretty dresses. We guessed this was all of the Miss Vietnams from the last 40 years getting together. Can you spot Paul doing the 'Where's Waldo' thing?

Adjacent to the memorial are the main government buildings and residence of Unkie Ho during the war. Born in 1965, I have memories of the War and of the protests, but they were those of a child. I remember playing Vietnam War with my army men, setting them up based on the maps that were on the TV. Did read and study about it quite a bit in school, but took this opportunity to reflect upon it with 40 years of history in the mirror. From everything I have seen and read, they Vietnamese were not an enemy to us but were portrayed as such being a pawn of the Cold War. They certainly used Russian assistance, but as a means to justify the end. Ho Chi Minh was a pragmatist, exceptional geopolitical strategist and his commitment to not falling for the trappings of power but rather, to live a humble and simple life gave me a new found respect and admiration of him. My favorite quote attributed to him came at the end of WWII. Once the Japanese were defeated, the choice was to allow China to gain influence in the country, or allow the French to return as colonial overlords. Sensing that the French wouldn't have a taste for long term occupation, he chose to go with the French rule telling his comrades that "I'd rather smell French shit for five years than eat Chinese shit for the rest of my life."

Had a chance to visit what remains of the Hoa Lo Prison. Also know as the Hanoi Hilton, it is where they held the American pilots shot down during the war. It was originally built by the French to hold political prisoners during their time of rule and the museum showed the horrible conditions the Vietnamese people endured at the hands of the French. The guillotine was still there.

The literature provided indicated that the Americans received far better treatment from their Vietnamese hosts than the Vietnamese were treated by the French.

Like I said, the list of things to see in Hanoi isn't long and we had hit most of the major ones except the spot that had the biggest write up in the guide books. Learning what it was, the kids were not excited about going, but with time left on our visit and nothing else major to see, I decided it was time to go. That place...the Temple of Literature. If you travel at all in Asia, you know that they love their temples. Have you seen this temple?, or you gotta see that one are two popular refrains. I've seen quite a few and they all sorta blend together...much like seeing that 40th church when you're in Rome. Add in the choking smell of incense and I do not rush to see them. The kids are even sicker of them than I, so when you combine Temple with another favorite term of kids...Literature...the fact that this was a vacation was hard to believe. I didn't tell them we were going so I could catch their expression when we walked up to it. Surprise!

It was very nice...big, well maintained, but bo-ring. I have mentioned that the kids go to a good school but it can tend towards uber-nerd. We're walking around the grounds and we run into one of Paul's school friends doing the same. Where else would you run into a kid from TAS in Vietnam but the Temple of Literature?

I know a lot of people that go for Vietnamese food, but it never did it for me and this visit did not change my taste for it in the least. As far as food goes, Hanoi has way better international options than Taipei does and we had respectable French and Italian food as well as some damn good meat at an Argentine restaurant. The local cuisine is super basic and cheap, but so unappealing. They of course have the crazy (to me) items on the menu.

One thing I did read about beforehand and had to try was the Kopi Luwak or Weasel coffee. This is coffee made by feeding weasels coffee berries, the beans then ferment in their digestive tracts and are harvested upon defecation. Had it a couple of times and couldn't really tell the difference between it and any other espresso.

Asian languages are filled with examples of words that sound dirty in English, but it felt like every word or phrase in Vietnamese can be made to sound inappropriate if said in the proper tone.