February 17th, 2021 Egypt

Hey there,

Gonna take you back in time.  To a simpler one but also to the very beginnings of what has become our current age.  This is an old school diary travelogue.

In March of 2020, Betty and I went to Egypt.  She had to go for work and was tacking on a few days to tour the place, and as Egypt has been number one in my list of destinations to visit since the 5th grade, I wormed my way in.  We departed on March 6th and it is hard to recall what the world was exactly like on that day, but Covid wasn't even called that then.  The locals were taking the stuff really seriously, but not nearly as much as they would.  The schools were fully open, no mask requirements, etc., but folks were still freaked mostly from people coming from China.  In the week leading up to departure, the shit was starting to hit the fan in places other than China (the Seattle outbreak had just happened) and we spent those days thinking about pulling the plug on the trip, even as late as the morning we left.  Egypt had reported one case and we didn't know then what we know now, so off we went.  In retrospect, that was a dumb ass move and is partially why I didn't write up this trip at the time cause the remaining threads of Catholic school made me ashamed of going.

As this was 11 months ago, am relying on my notebook for details and observations.

The airport and airplane were eerily empty but the flights to Istanbul and onto Cairo were uneventful.  We got into Cairo midday and since we had the afternoon free, booked a couple hour tour on a traditional boat called a felucca to cruise on the Nile.  Historically sail powered, if there isn't enough wind then they crank up the motor as they did on this day.  The weather was good and it was the right thing to do in the few hours of jet lagged consciousness we had.

We enjoyed it OK.  Things we noted were the amount of huge party boats that were docked and cruising that played annoying hip hop at ridiculously high volumes.  We also thought the water was relatively cleanish, but there was tons of garbage, especially on the banks of the river.  And those banks were extremely unfriendly for people to enjoy.  I pictured walking paths and for the banks to be gathering points for the citizens, but they were basically sheer walls with nothing else but the aforementioned garbage.  We were the only ones on the boat and towards the end of the outing, another little motorboat with a mother and young (9ish) daughter goes past us, and as they get right alongside, the little girl holds up a giant knife and does a throat slashing gesture at me.

We were at a nice hotel and the lounge was on the 26th floor, so as your enjoying your dinner and such, can look out over the city, and seeing the pyramids in the distance had me giddy with anticipation.

Next morning was the start of our tour time and the pyramids were the first destination.  Have had a hard time writing up this entry for a bunch of reasons...didn't do it right away cause of the aforementioned embarrassment, there were so many great pix to go through that I would be overwhelmed in looking at them when I tried to curate, then had waited so long that some of the minutiae has faded, and finally, what can I say about the stuff that is so iconic and has been said so many times that I don't need to repeat.  If I run through some of the things with a couple words, there you go.

We started our day with a drive to the most iconic complex in Giza with the great pyramids and Sphynx.  A dream come true.

Our guide Jameer, who asked us to call him Jimmy, knew all the crafty picture poses and had us perform all of them, much to Betty's delight.

This one kinda says it all

We did a little camel ride around the compound for more fun.  The dudes tending the camels seem to be having a good time giving our rides the names Mickey Mouse and Michael Jordan.

The Sphynx is right there too.  More amazement and staged photos.

Lunch everyday was almost identical...choice of chicken kebabs or kefta (meatballs), but today's had a lady making fresh (and warm) pita and also came with a fermented cheese that they only make in this area.   I liked it but when I tried to describe it and get it on the table later, all the locals would turn up their nose.

The afternoon was spent walking around an open air museum in ancient Memphis where they had a bunch of relics that were in poor condition, or good condition considering they're 5000 years old.

And then it was over to the Step Pyramid of King Djosser.  

In the distance you can see a bunch of the other pyramids, including the bent one.  All of the pyramids are in the Cairo region and date back 4-5 thousand years.  Later sites down the Nile were from later Kingdoms.

There were a couple of tombs to explore and climbing down these narrow passageways is not for the claustrophobic.  I wouldn't say that I am very nervous of these things, but living my entire life in earthquake country does give me pause about being in enclosed spaces.

And heiroglyphics.  They are on every conceivable space and became just a blur.

Day two was dedicated to sites in Cairo with the first stop being the Egyptian Museum. The building is unsurprisingly British in design 

They're building a new one, it might even be open now, out towards the Giza pyramids.  We drove past it and it is modern and huge.  With the move imminent, they really weren't spending a ton of time keeping this one nice.  It was jammed with stuff and there was dust on everything.  There are so many artifacts even in this smallish museum that it is a bit overwhelming.  The centerpiece is the King Tut room that contains his sarcophagi and other relics.  The sarcophagi are knockouts, but taking pictures in that room are forbidden.  It is a lot smaller space than you'd imagine, and what was weird about the room is that the windows are wide open allowing the soot and dust of the city right in.  

The museum is in Tahrir Square, which is the cultural/social heart of Cairo and was the nexus of the protests in Egypt during the Arab Spring.  Probably looked a lot different pre-riots as you couldn't go a few feet without there being a fence or barricade now.  It felt chaotic and very unwelcoming.

To be honest, Cairo was a total dump.  No mass transit to speak of, which means lots of cars and pollution.  And the traffic is as bad as I've ever experienced and goes on 24/7.  Didn't see a sidewalk that wasn't totally cracked and it seems that every building was built without the ones around it being considered.  Am sure there are areas where people with money seclude themselves, but we didn't get into any of those.  None of this is surprising as the city is ancient and has had a few millennia of ineffectual/colonial governance.  What I'm saying is get in, see the stuff, and get out.

After the AM museum, took the 2hr/10km drive over to the Citadel.  I'm calm in traffic as a passenger, but when behind the wheel get totally aggravated by traffic and know I'd lose my shit if forced to drive here.  The Citadel is on the highest hill overlooking the city and has a mosque that is famous.  Nice, and the view of the city is unparalleled, but if I had to do it again, would probably target the Coptic Christian sites with the 1/2 day that this took to do.

On the way to the Citadel, we passed the oldest cemetery, which is giant and called City of the Dead.  Read about it in my book and was curious as it sounded interesting, but Jameer said it was quite dangerous as it is not only a cemetery but that 10's of thousands of people live in it.  You could see glimpses of them over the wall.  Read this article recently where a highway is going through a part of it and they're forcibly evicting the people living there.  They're pissed but not really fighting the government cause it is military again and you really don't want to make waves.  Whenever I would engage in politics with our guides, they were all in favor of the order that al-Sissi has brought back to the country after the Muslim Brotherhood period.  Didn't feel right or worthwhile engaging with them on this sensitive topic cause they all rightfully live in fear of being reported.

I did get to tell some of the gags that I'd researched before going.  The only one that got any traction from them was the one that goes, 'Why wasn't Jesus born in Egypt?  Cause they couldn't find three wise men or a virgin."  You can use that one anywhere, but it feels best done here.

Last stop of the day was at the souk called Khan El Khalili, which is billed as 'one of the stunning bazaars in the Middle East'.  Not saying I'm an expert on the matter, but I've seen a few and this was pure tourist trap.  We couldn't even find a magnet we liked.  We did enjoy a cafe at an old shop within the market.

 The third day was most fabulous.  Up and early to the airport for the 1hr flight to Luxor. 

This is the first moment in time where masks are now worn by everyone.  More on that in a bit.

We were met my our guide (Ismail) for the rest of our trip at the airport and drove straight to the Valley of the Kings.  I knew that all the burial chambers were located in the same area, but what was surprising was just how small that area is.  About 1000 feet long, it contains some 60 tombs, including King Tutankhamun's.  The price of admission allows you to go inside three of them and we did a Ramses trifecta, visiting III, IV, and IX (3,4 and 9).  If you wanted to see Tut's, that cost extra and Ismail said it wasn't worth it as he died young and the tomb was not nearly as elaborate as the other ones since it was a rush job.  You could see why it remained hidden from grave robbers as its entrance was right below another tomb so was obscured until Howard Carter stumbled upon it.

Going into these three, you have to descend down long narrow passageways and then can more around in the different chambers.  There is not an inch of wall or ceiling that isn't covered by intricately carved and painted hieroglyphics.  In each are dudes that are there to make sure you don't damage or graffiti the places, but they seem more interested in asking for a couple bucks to let you behind ropes into supposedly off limits rooms.  For a couple bucks, why not.  

Impossible and pointless to detail what you see...

Here is a YouTube video taken in the Ramses III tomb that does it some justice.

Talk about barren landscape

Next up and just around the corner was the Temple of Hatshepsut.  We had trouble saying it and Ismail said it sounds like Hat Cheap Suit.  The 8th grade baseball kids have Egypt in history and we quiz each other on Egyptian history, and they all say that name very well.

I have searched for it for years, but there was an episode of Speed Racer where this temple was featured as the home of the gang that Speed was fighting.  I can't remember for sure what gang that was but my five year old self remembers it being the Car Acrobatic Team.  You'd think that the internet would be of some help here, but I have found no trace of that episode anywhere.

The design of the temple is unlike any other and it is not in terribly good condition, but still breathtaking.  What also sets it apart is that Hatshepsut was the only female Pharaoh.  Cleopatra was too, but she was Greek and not in the heyday of the classic periods.  Still very sexy though.

Ismail.

By all accounts, Hatshepsut was a badass, but the dudes never bought in and so a lot of her markings were obliterated from the records after her demise.

The Valley of the Kings and Hatshepsut's Temple are on the west side of the Nile, which is where the dead people go.  The east side is where all the living gets done, so we crossed over the river.  They only allow bridges every 60kms for some reason, so we took a little ferry boat.

On the east side is the Karnak Temples Complex and Temple of Luxor.  You may know Karnak from the Johnny Carson bit where he says the answer and then reads the question.  One I heard when I was little and have never forgotten went: Answer - Sis Boom Bah.  He opens the envelope and reads the question, What a sheep sounds like when it explodes

You probably never saw it, but there is an Agatha Christie movie from 1978 called Murder On The Nile and a key scene is filmed at the Karnak complex and that has always stuck in my mind.  The most striking feature is Hypostyle Hall that is 5000m2 and has 134 33ft columns in 16 rows.  Makes the hair stand up on your neck.

This complex also has 2 of the 8 remaining obelisks left in Egypt.  There were 102 total, but colonialism.

It was a long day and we got back to our hotel late afternoon with a nice Nile view.

Mentioned above that this was the first day that masks were seen everywhere.  We woke up this morning and looked on the English language Egyptian paper and saw the headline that a coronavirus outbreak occurred on a Nile cruise ship based in Luxor.  We considered a Nile cruise but it took too much time and we obviously dodged a bullet there.  There was one case in Egypt before we left Taiwan, and as of this moment, the place started to explode with it.  The people on all of the cruise ships were held on board that day, which made our visits to the sights pleasant as there were very few people about and we had most everything to ourselves.  And NO Chinese tourists.  Testing wasn't a thing then so they held people on board to take temperatures and look for symptoms.  They released everyone this afternoon and the hotels filled up with tourists.  The WiFi in our room was not good so I went down to the lobby to catch up and grab a cappuccino, and the scene was explosive with tourists frantically trying to get out of the country.  Next to me was a woman who was crying and pleading with their tour operator to get her the hell back to the States.  

What made it...funnier is not the word, but close...was that the headline was that the virus was brought on board the ship by a Taiwanese-American woman.  Betty resembles that.  This other Taiwanese-American woman took a trip and then the boat made two more trips before they discovered the virus was circulating by which point the outbreak was on..  The day we got back to Taiwan, there was a fantastic article in the Washington Post that detailed how this all went down.  You can read the article here.  It is good but long,  however reading about the coronavirus and how it was spreading in March seems not only so long ago, but almost quaint.

On day 4, we drove south from Luxor to Aswan (4 or so hours of driving) stopping at a couple of sights along the way...the Temple of Horus in Edfu and the Temple of Kom Ombo.  Maybe it was because the day before was so exceptional, but I don't have a ton of memories or notes from these two stops and even the pictures looked similar to the previous day and the only way to tell them apart is that they were date stamped.

Betty must have felt similarly cause in addition to temple pictures, she took a few dozen of the locals on donkeys.

In the town we stopped for lunch, Ismail took us to the spice shop.  These guides love to take you to places for you to buy shit, and assume they get a kickback if we buy, which I have no problem with cause that's what makes the world go round.  In Cairo, they took us to a place that sold papyrus art, where we bought a few things that I haven't opened since.  Need to put framing those on my things to do list, especially if we get stuck here again this summer..  Tomorrow, we'd be taken to a shop that sold essences...they had every kind and we bought a 4 pack.  We are getting our money's worth from those as Betty has a diffuser that she turns on while we're in the office.  At this spice shop, I went a bit crazy, buying a bunch of dates, some tea, cinnamon and a couple other things, and the bill was like US$100.  I still have a bit of the tea left so we used everything, but still felt a bit ripped off.

We hit Aswan mid-afternoon and the sight to see there is the Philae Temple.  You need to take a little boat as it is on an island.  There were a hundred or so of these little boats to ferry passengers to the island, but the virus made only about 5 viable on this day.

Hard to see it, but that is the Aswan dam in the next photo.  Doesn't look like much, but it not only tamed the Nile, it created a 298 mile long lake/reservoir that took 4 years to fill and stretches into Somalia.

On the last day of our tour, we were to drive to Abu Simbel, which is 3.5 hours south.  Another place that I knew from a grainy film they showed us in elementary school.  When they built the Aswan Dam, they determined that it was gonna flood some ancient sights, including the Abu Simbal temples, and I remember the film detailing the engineering feats they undertook to move them up the hill and out of the path of the future lake.

You've seen these things in pictures, but gawdamn are they incredible in person.  

It's not just the outside they moved, but there are rooms filled with carvings and such inside that were moved stone by stone.

This one is in a room that only gets sunlight one day of the year and it only shines on one of the faces.  I should say that at every stop and sight, the guides would explain which god or pharaoh did what, but my brain could not absorb much of it and I would be doing a disservice to try to recreate any of that now.  What did get through was marveling at the technical skill of the artists and the length of time this culture existed.

There are two temples...a boys and a girls.  What word for amazing haven't I used?  Whichever one it is should be the most emphatic cause this site was my favorite of all the ones we saw.  

Look at how few people there are.  Ismail said he has never seen it like this, even when terrorists were wreaking havoc a few years previous.  On the walk back to the car, we walked through the visitors center and running on a loop is that grainy movie of the Abu Simbel move I saw as a youth.  

On the way to and from Abu Simbel, you are driving through the easternmost edge of the Sahara desert.  Desolate and hypnotic.  There is one place to stop at the half way point to grab a coffee and visit the bathroom.

We get back to Aswan in time for our flight back to Cairo.  The next day was supposed to be the one Betty came to Egypt to work for and I was free to do whatevs.  Had been researching day trips...there was one out to the Sahara to see these geologic formations that I was interested in from the great episode of the documentary series How The Earth Was Made on the Sahara (must viewing).  I also considered going up to Alexandria, or out to see the Suez Canal, but the dude we were working with said that they were far and traffic was inconsistent and might not make it back in time for our flight out that night.  Decided I was gonna do a tour of the Coptic Christian sights in Cairo for 1/2 day.

As we are watching the news and talking with the tour operator, we get word that a storm is a-brewin' and is supposed to hit Cairo late the night we get in.  The weatherman says it is gonna be bad and they have already canceled school and public business the next day in anticipation of it.  The tour guys, as well as the people Betty is supposed to meet, says that if it is what they say it is gonna be, that all activities are off.  If the Egyptians know one thing, it is storms of Biblical proportion, and this was one of them.  We got into our hotel before it started, but once the storm started, you could easily tell where the authors of the Bible got the idea about the 7 plagues from.  The hotel we stayed at was in a cool spot right near the pyramids and the lightning storm really added to the mood.

This is also the time when I still had the Sideshow Bob look going.  Don't miss those days at all.

So the storm is brutal and we stick at the hotel and watch the airlines website to see if we're gonna get out of town.  The guys Betty came to work with come out to our place to meet there in the afternoon and we see our flight is gonna leave but is delayed, and these nice work guys give us a ride (2 hrs) to the airport.  If I thought that traffic in Cairo was bad before, seeing it in a deluge took it to a whole other level.  The place just isn't built to easily drain and we went through many spots that were over a foot deep.  

We get to the airport and our flight is ultimately delayed a few hours.  Know that making our connecting flight in Istanbul is gonna be tight at best and sure enough, we miss it.  It's now 2am or something and the next flight out leaves in 20 something hours, so the airline puts us up in a hotel.  Problem is, they have just recently built a new airport in Istanbul and it opened a month previous.  It looks really nice, but all of the associated infrastructure is not ready and that includes hotels next to it, so we have to drive for an hour to where the old airport was to get into the airline assigned hotel.  The driver was super friendly and told us that if we were here the night before, we would have ridden with Morgan Freeman.

The hotel is fine.  At this point in the virus timeline, people are freaking out everywhere, so the mood is subdued.  We had time to get out and see something or go to the place we loved to eat, but it just didn't feel right.  Plus, our bags made the original flight and we didn't have much in the way of spare clothes and I spilled on my shirt in Egypt.  The hotel had some shops and spent 20 bucks buying the ugliest Istanbul t-shirt you've ever seen.  

We make it out and get back to Taipei and at this point, Egypt isn't on the restricted to enter list, but it would get added the very next day.  The school wants nothing to do with me for at least two weeks.  If this were now, Betty and I would both have to have quarantined for 2 weeks in different spaces, but again, March 14th, 2020 was a different world.  Betty and I stayed home for two weeks and we almost went stir crazy and it is impossible for me to comprehend how all y'all have been doing this for 10 months.  

During those two weeks, we watched the local news and they would report on the new cases daily.  There was a Taiwanese tour group that was in Egypt the same time as us, and that group was on the plane that we were supposed to have taken back originally.  Each day, they started reporting that a person or two from that group got the virus.  After a couple days, they started to refer to that tour group as ill-fated, and after a week when 20 or more of them had come down with it, the paper changed the description of the group from ill-fated to doomed.  Again, good fortune shone on us for missing the flight with the doomed tour group.  But reading about them every day, I started to get a bit wiggy that I had contacted it and started taking my temperature every day.  One day I even convinced myself I was short of breath and to this day a part of me thinks that I had contacted the virus then.